Whooee Soul Patrol!!!!

'I’m gonna do what I do best, sing from the heart and scare children.'

"Taylor Hicks" on SNL

Monday Night Madness

I've sitting here at work on Monday catching up on my blog reading since my day job is currently taken up with the business of doing the final edit on my YA so that I can get it to super duper agent by the end of the week. So far, Trump booted off two contestants off The Apprentice tonight both women because they stabbed each other in the back, and the men won because Sean is a metrosexual. I swear Trump makes up the rules as he goes along. One week, he tells them to look out only for themselves, the next week he wants everyone to get along. However, I must say that Ivanka keeps impressing me every time she shows up on this show. It's amazing to me that she's a product of Ivana and Donald Trump, she seems so level-headed and smart.

I had to watch Honey, We're Killing the Kids, tonight at work. If you dont' know about this show, it's on TLC. Dr. Lisa Hark goes around the country scaring the crap out of parents for not taking care of their kids health by showing them what their kids are going to look like in thirty years if they keep eating the way they do. Tonight's family, The Barfields, used to fry all their food in pork fat. No one exercised, the father never ate with the kids, preferring to sit in the living room eating of a tray while watching TV. It makes you wonder why people have kids. I don't think a vegetable was eaten in their house unless it was deep fried and dipped in ranch dressing.

They threw out 8 bags of junk food! There was one little cute moment when the family donned mourning weeds to bury the deep fryer in the back yard. Watching the kids learn to eat vegetables was actually great, although their first experiment with beets didn't go very well. Let me tell you beets are an acquired taste if you're used to eating potato skins and spinach dip.

I hope that the Barfields manage to continue their now healthy lifestyle, because I'm telling you, it was scary to see what the kids were going to look like in their forties. Not to mention the fact that the ever helpful Dr. Lisa Hark told them that the kids had a life expectancy of only 65!

What did you watch tonight?

Thanks for reading!

EKM

How do you spell smorgasborg?

So I'm reading Marie Claire this month, and there's an article on the best place in the world to live if you're a woman and it turns out to be Sweden. Yes, Sweden, land of the midnight sun. Why? Well, in Sweden, they had the first maternity leave program way back in 1901! That's a 105 years ago people. Plus, all children regardless of sex have to take classes in cooking, sewing, woodworking, and and metalworking in school. Not to mention the fact college is free in Sweden, and that half the members of Parliament are women.

They even changed the line of succession so that Crown Princess Victoria will inherit the crown because she's the eldest instead of being passed over for her brother who is younger than she is. Sweden was found to be the world's most advanced country for women by the World Economic Forum. Where did the US land on this list? Uh, number 17 right before Costa Rica. Yes, Costa Rica. That's how bad we suck here in the US.

Oh, and men do more housework in Sweden then anywhere else in the world, probably without being asked!

When you think about Sweden has given us Bjorn Borg, Dolph Lundgren, Vendela and Lena Olin. They've also given us Peter Stomare from Prison Break, but they made him leave the country because only gorgeous people are allowed to stay in Sweden. How can you not love a country that gave us ABBA?

Of course, everything is not hunky-dory in Sweden. They have the highest suicide rate in the world. They also have the highest income tax rate in the world (someone has to pay for all those services!). It's also incredibly expensive. The average woman takes home $7,000 less than the average American woman. No wonder they all come here to go shopping at Century 21 and Loemann's. Non designer jeans cost $130 in Sweden. Geez, jeans at the Gap only cost $24!

The other problem. Everyone goes dutch. Swedish men apparently never offer to pay, which must go over well if they're working here in the States. Especially in New York, where most women expect the man to at least offer to pay. They also apparently don't hold open doors, or help women carry heavy baggage either. Also, Swedish men are apparently too lazy to make the first move, so the women have to do all the asking out.

The upside is that it's okay for a woman to date 3 or 4 men without people thinking she's a total slut. And when they do hook up, they have lots of babies because in Sweden men and women get up to 13 months paid leave and then an additional 3 months at a fixed rate. Compare that to the 8 to 12 weeks you get here in the States if you're lucky. My mother only took off 9 weeks when she had me and that was back in the 1960's. And she probably wasn't paid for the time she took off either. Plus they have to hold your job for you when you get back.

I knew an actress who was married to a Norwegian guy and she had both of her kids in Norway because it was free!

Another drawback besides the long, cold, dark winters is the pay to pee public toilets that are unisex. Also women make 83% of the average male salary and Amnesty International doesn't think they're doing enough to tackle domestic violence and voilence against ethnic minorities.

Oh, in case you wanted to know, the other 9 countries are in order:

2) Norway
3) Iceland
4) Denmark
5) Finland

(Anyone notice that the top five countries are Scandinavian? Hey, Mary Donaldson moved from Australia to Denmark and became Crown Princess!)

6) New Zealand
7) Canada (why am I not surprised, but if it's so great why do so many Canadians live here?)
8) The UK (yeah, now you're talking. Scotland is really looking for people to emigrate)
9) Germany (huh? Would never have seen that one coming, I would have thought The Netherlands but hey they just elected a woman chancellor, and we still can't elect a woman VP!)
10) Australia (yummy Aussie guys grilling shrimp on the barbie when they're not surfing at Bondi Beach. Where was I?)

Is it just me or does anyone else find it weird that third world countries have elected women leaders but in the US, no woman has risen higher than US Senator (I'm not talking cabinet posts because those are appointed). I'll get off my soap box now.

So there you have it. Sweden the no. 1 country in the world for women.

How hard is it to learn Swedish?

EKM

The Night of Sixteen Dates

I'm taking a little break from my mad dash to finish whipping my manuscript into shape before I send it off next week to blog about my first step back into the cesspool of dating after a long hiatus. As hard as it is out there, I'm not ready to give up on love. The apartment full of cats will have to wait.

I'd already thrown my picture up on JDate (yes, I know it's supposed to be for Jewish singles, but hey I like Jewish men, and it's a jungle out there. A girl's got to do, what a girl's got to do. So suck it!), but on-line dating just seems so impersonal to me. Plus, it's like another full-time job, and I already have 3 of those, so I needed to do something a little quicker. Hence, speed-dating.

I signed up on Tuesday night for NY Easy Dates which promised 16 dates in one night. Great, I thought, I like dating in bulk. After all it's quantity, not quality that counts. Sixteen dates, that's like a month or two of dating right there. Plus you get to skip that whole emailing and then talking on the phone before you have that first date. And we all know that people can be great in email, but then you meet them and there are no sparks. Plus the cost was right. I managed to get $5 of the price, so it was only $32 which comes out to about $2 per date.

The venue was a bar called M downtown on the border of Chinatown, Little Italy and Soho. It was a bit of a hike from the train station in high heels. Anyway, I rushed home after work to change into something more 'I'm meeting 16 men' than the outfit I wore to work. Of course after being warm all today, it started to pour the minute I got out of the train station on the way home which meant I had to fix my hair as well. I ended up wearing the same wrap dress that did nothing for Auction Guy.

I'm actually glad I did, because all the other women there were wearing suits, so at least I stood out. After checking in, I bellied up to the bar and ordered a Scorpion Honey instead of something wimpy like wine. I figured I'm a Scorpio, so why not a Scorpion Honey? The bartender described it to me as a margarita with alot of fruit juice. Fine, just up my alley. I chatted with another woman at the bar about why we were there. This was her second time doing the speed-dating thing, so we bonded a little.

Finally the evening began. The first part of the evening the men moved from table to table, and then after a break it was our turn to move. Frankly, I didn't like that. I prefer being in the position of power, and letting the men do all the work. Plus, the stools the men were sitting on had no backs, which led to a lot of slumping.

To make a long story short, I met sixteen men that I spent a grand total of six minutes with. For the most part the time went really fast. There were only a few guys that I had to struggle to converse with. Most of the guys were nice, two or three of them were borderline creepy/psychotic. Not bad odds. Out of that sixteen, I could see myself going out with about five of them, which is lot for me, because I'm really picky. Surprisingly, I hardly thought about my manuscript or the fact that I was missing the Will & Grace Finale of all Finale's (I taped it).

It was interesting to see what the guys chose to talk about. What is this obsession we have in this country with knowing what people do for a living? Only a few men asked me anything about me personally, or tried to get to know me on any level. The ones that I had an actual normal conversation with were the ones that I was interested in seeing again.

No real sparks with any of them though, which is fine. As I said, I'm just dipping my toe in again, so I'm not expecting to meet my man the first time out. I mean, I thought Auction Guy could have been my man, and you see how wrong I was about that.

Now the next step is to log onto the company web-site and put in my choices, and then see if I have any matches. I'm pretty much thinking there might only be one or two out of my five choices. I'm definitely planning to do this again, maybe with another company. I did meet a potential new female friend. The woman who sat to my right, it turned out we had a lot in common including our obsession with shoes and Grey's Anatomy. Plus, she lives in the same building as one of my best friends. How cool is that?

Thanks for reading!

EKM

Can't stay to blog!

No time to blog today. I received a request for my full manuscript of Crazy Little Thing Called Love from super duper agent #1, and I need to sit down and go over the manuscript one final time with a fine tooth comb to make sure there are no misspellings, no tense problems, and most importantly no holes in the plot! And then it's off to the post-office.

Way to go Fox News for showing Taylor and Katharine in your studio before Seacrest revealed that Elliott was going home. Rupert Murdoch must be proud of you guys!

EKM

Character Conundrum

Well, I finally finished the partial of my next YA, and I sat down to read it yesterday. Surprise! It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. That doesn't mean it was great either. It was just good. The bare bones are there, and I have some good lines, and my scenes move for a change. The biggest problem right now are my characters. I haven't delineated them enough.

My main character, yeah, she's all there. I mean my supporting characters, the ones who if you're not careful, can take over a book. Not there yet with that. So the next step is take a step back and really look and who these people are, and how they related to my main character Hagar. What role and purpose do they serve in her life, and what do they possibly want? Can I fit in a tiny subplot for them? Probably not, but I don't want them to be cardboard cutouts either. They need to have hopes and dreams even if most of it doesn't make it into the story.

I also have to watch out that I don't make Hagar's nemesis the generic bad girl/bitch ala Mean Girls. Kristen has to be fleshed out as well. One of my favorite bitches is Nicole on Popular played by Tammy Michaels Etheridge. At first glance, Nicole just seems like the head cheerleader bitch who stomps all over the unpopular kids at Kennedy High. However we learn that Nicole herself was once unpopular until she lost weight and turned things around. Ironically she's now treating people the way she once was treated. She finally gets her comeuppance in the second season.

Chris the guy Kristen and Hager both have feelings for also needs more personality. I'm thinking of making him not only dyslexic both also the son of the principal of the school they both attend. St. Agnes Academy is one of those really small private schools that you find in most big cities, sort of like my old high school.

My graduating class was a high of 34 students compared to the year before when there were only 13. 19 girls and 15 boys, and 3/4 of the class had known each other since we were six years old. By the time we graduated we were sick of each other. That's something else I need to emphasize in the book. Small schools can be very claustrophic, everyone knows everyone else's business, you've all dated each other. It's almost like being on reality TV, or living in a fish bowl.

I hope to give the reader a glimpse into a private school world that's different from the Gossip Girl/IT Girl world. We weren't necessarily focused on status in my school. How much money someone's family had wasn't part of the equation and since we all wore uniforms, so one was focused on who had the newest Fendi bag, so our obsessions became each other in a way. Who was dating whom, what your SAT score was, where were you going to college, what did you do over the summer, that sort of thing.

My school was run by an Episopalian order of nuns. Yes, not all nuns are Catholic. That was a shocker for me too. For the first year I went to St. Hilda's, I was confused about whether or not the school was Catholic and if I was Catholic. I think I had just seen The Sound of Music to, so that was my impressions of nuns. We actually had a sort of a Julie Andrews nun at St. Hilda's, Sister Regina, who played the guitar and taught us songs like 'Frankie and Johnny' and the 'Wabash Cannonball'.

I guess what I'm getting at, is that I need to map out who everyone is at St. Agnes from teachers down to the janitors, as well as all the major and most of the minor characters that are going to be in the book as I have them so far before I start my editing process.

Fortunately the editing won't take that long since I just to need to really slot in some character tags and traits.

Thanks for stopping by!

EKM

American Idol - The Final Three

I'm still gutted by the Grey's Anatomy finale last night and Sunday. 3 hours of gut-wrenching drama. Shonda Rimes, you are my American Idol! It's going to take me until September to process everything that went on in the episode. Thank God tonight I have a little American Idol to watch to cheer me up.

I found this hysterical cartoon on-line today:

The judges have picked their songs for the contestants. Taylor was given 'You are so beautiful' to sing which should be fabulous. I mean Taylor is Joe Cocker Jr. Simon chose 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow' one of the most oversung songs in the last 100 years. I don't remember the song that Paula chose for Elliott but it was pretty obscure.

The weirdest choices have to be the songs that Clive Davis has chosen for the contestants. 'Open Arms' by Journey? 'I Believe I Can Fly' by pedophile R. Kelly? And 'Dancing in the Dark' by Bruce Springsteen. What is he thinking? 'Walking in Memphis' would have been a much better choice for Taylor, and 'The First Time Ever I saw his face' for Katharine could have been so interesting. Ouch!

Here's hoping the songs the idols choose for themselves are much better than Clive Davis' choices, otherwise Katharine McPhee might be going home tomorrow.

Thanks for reading!

EKM

Keeping it in the Family

So this weekend, I watched Rumor Has It, the Jennifer Aniston movie that kind of is about whether or not the story in The Graduate is based on a true story. It was pretty awful but one of the things that struck me was the fact Kevin Costner played a guy who slept with three generations of women in one family, grandmother, mother and daughter. Which is kind of gross if you ask me. Then I followed that up with The Family Stone, another heatwarming movie that in the trailer seemed to be one movie, and then turned out to be something else. But again what struck me was not the performances, although it was nice to see SJP play a character 360 degrees away from Carrie Bradshaw, but the idea of two brothers involved with the same woman. Now I don't want to spoil the movie for anyone who hasn't seen it, so stop reading right now if that's you.

For those who have seen it, was it only me who got a little creeped out by the fact that a) Dermot Mulroney had no problem suddenly switching his affections to SJP's sister, or the fact that he basically had no problems with his brother ending up with SJP? It was like some 70's key party with the four of them.

This comes on the heels of Denise Richards helping herself to ex-best friend's soon to be ex-husband and the most infamous of all Woody Allen leaving Mia Farrow for her adopted daughter.

Now historically in different cultures, a brother was required to marry his sibling's widow, to take care of her and any children she may have had. An in Egypt of course, brothers and sisters routinely married each other. Rumors swirled around Regency England that Bryon and his half-sister were extremely close if you know what I'm saying.

But it's still kind of gross. As far as I'm concerned dating your ex-boyfriend's brother, or your step-father, or even your friend's old boyfriend is like sharing their underwear. You just don't do it. Hey, I know that it's a jungle out there dating-wise, but you need to step out of the cesspool. People have asked me why Impossibly Handsome British Friend and I have never gotten together, and it's because he's slept with all of my friends. Sleeping with him would be like sleeping with all of them and I'm just not into it.

One of the skankiest women on daytime television, Brooke Logan Forrester Forrester Forrester of The Bold and The Beautiful has not only married two brothers and their father, she's also slept with two of her daughter's husbands. Are you skeeved out yet? But she loved them all so it must be okay. Even though her kids' half-brothers have also been their stepfathers.

Now I know that people use the excuse of you can't help who you love, and the heart wants what the heart wants (also known as the Woody Allen excuse), but I say that's total bullshit. There are certain things you just don't cross. A friend of mine once said that there was no way in hell she could sleep with a guy who had ever been intimate with her mother. I would feel like a total freak if a friend's father asked me, even if he were cute and single. Be my friend's stepmother? Are you kidding me?

You know I didn't always feel this way. One of my favorite romances is Sarah's Child by Linda Howard, which is you ignore the plot is one of the most emotionally satisfying books. You root for Sarah, you want Rome to fall in love with her and for them to live happily ever after. I just pretend that the whole thing about her being in love with her best friend's husband for years, and never having a life until her friend dies and she gets to have him, didn't happen.

What do other people think? Skeevy or understandable?

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there.

Since my own mother passed away almost seventeen years ago, I've been thinking lately about how much she influenced me.

I'm like my mother in that I never take no for an answer.

I'm like my mother in that I have champagne tastes on a beer budget.

I'm like my mother in that I fight for what I believe in even when it's not popular.

I'm like my mother in that I'm loyal to my friends.

I'm like my mother in that I mother everyone including my friends.

I'm like my mother in that I totally believe Oswald was framed.

I wish I more like my mother in terms of being more gregarious. My mother could walk into a room and own it. Whereas I still have to fight not to stand in a corner whenever I'm at a party.

More than that I just miss my mother.

Happy Mother's Day!

Playing catch-up

This weekend is all about playing catch-up with all the things that have fallen by the wayside the past two weeks. First up is making sure that I finish paying all my bills such as the phone bill, and the paying off the repairs to my bedroom ceiling.

I need to take some clothes this weekend to Goodwill as well to get them out of my house, commencing the Spring cleaning that I haven't quite done yet.

Next is signing up for the National conference in Atlanta, and either finding a room-mate or a cheaper hotel than the Hilton. I'm leaning towards the Hampton Inn which is $114.00. I'm booking the Hilton, but I'm going to be on the look-out that the prices drop as we get closer to July. I'm cashing in my frequent flyer miles which means that I'm flying back to New York on an early 8:00 a.m. flight on Sunday. Ouch! That means cutting back on the drinking the night before at the RITA awards.

I have a President's Letter due on Monday for our June issue of Keynotes, plus Market News and our calendar of events. I never know what I'm going to write about before I actually sit down and start writing. I have some ideas but who knows what will actually appear on the page.

I also have to set up my schedule for the next weeks at my night job, which is a pain in the ass as well. Since I'm trying to get back into the swing of things dating-wise, it means signing up for several speed-dating events etc. while also setting up my schedule.

Yes, I swore that I would sign up for two dating events before the end of the month and I'm sticking to it. Auction Guy and I have a Pride & Prejudice thing going on right now, so I don't know what's happening with that. Remember that scene in the ballroom when Darcy is asked to dance with Elizabeth and he says no, that he doesn't find her all that? Well that's how I felt last Friday night. Oy!

Thanks for stopping by!

EKM

Farewell to Chris - MY American Idol

Short post today. Still processing that MY Chris was voted off American Idol last night. Totally in mourning, my enjoyment of the show has just dimmed. The only thing that can salvage it is if MY Taylor wins the whole thing. Damn you Katherine McPhee!

The other saving grace is that Chris is such a true talent that I'm sure either Clive Davis or some other enterprising producer will snap him up in a heartbeat. His career has just begun.

Mid-Week Blues

I really don't have much to say today. I'm a little tired which isn't unusual for me in the middle of the week. The weather has changed once again in New York from nice and warm, to chilly which is throwing me off. I'm still reeling from something that happened last Friday night which I don't really want to talk about, but I should stop thinking about since it's throwing me off and making me a little depressed. Not even the chocolate biscuits that Gaby, one of the bankers from the Sydney office has brought in is cheering me up. You know you're depressed when even chocolate does nothing for you.

I'm reading Nancy Martin's new Blackbird Sister's mystery. I have no appetite for romance right now, even though I just took out Alison Kent's most recent Blaze from the library. I'm just in kind of a funk. However, I did watch American Idol last night, and I was really surprised by how much I liked Elliott last night. Not so much his first song, but his rendition of 'Trouble' I thought was really hot. For those few people who haven't succumbed to the lure of AI, last night's theme was Elvis Presley songs, which could have been really bad (think Honeymoon in Vegas with Nic Cage dressed like Elvis), but turned out to be Taylor Hick's night. Katherine McPhee was at a disadvantage and she never quite found her footing. Whether that means she's booted off, and we have an all male semi-final remains to be seen. Still it made me want to go out and buy an Elvis Presley CD.

I'm still querying, and sending out partials, along with making revisions on the end of my YA, and working on the plotting for my next. I'm really trying to push through on this despite my malaise and slight depression.

To cheer myself up, it's sushi for lunch. Nothing makes me happier than a spicy yellow-tail roll unless it's a california roll with real crab, instead of that imitation crap you normally get at your local sushi joint.

Thanks for stopping by.

EKM

P.S. If anyone has $11.7M lying around, Harry Belafonte is selling his 21 room mansion on West End Avenue here in New York. Check out this link: http://www.corcoran.com/property/listing.aspx?Region=NYC&ListingID=798679

You can also see the floor plan on Curbed's website.

The High Cost of Dating

As anyone knows who reads this blog or my profile, I'm single and ready to settle down if I can jsut find the right person. I recently signed up with JDate (yes, I know I'm not Jewish, but most of the men I've dated have been Jewish. Or Catholic. I'm not sure what that's about). I figured I have shiksappeal, I might as well work it. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that it costs $39.95 a month. That's one dinner out, or four movies, not to mention my cable bill. It made me sit down and start to calculate how much it costs to get a date in the modern age.

One month on-line personals $29.95 - $39.95 (Most people I know use more than one) - $60-80 a month

Photography (instead of just having your best friend take your picture for your personal) $75-$300

Speed dating events - 2 x $29.95

Weekend at Club Getaway (slumber camp for adults) - $350.00

Membership in Social Circles - $900 for one year, plus $10 a month charges

Attending a benefit in the hopes of meeting someone - $75 - $3,000 (Candace Bushnell met her husband at the NYCB benefit. Her ticket cost $3,000 but hey she's married)

Clothing to wear on dates - $350 - $500

Bikini Waxing (just in case you get lucky) - $40.00

Eyebrow, manicure, pedicure - $40.00

Therapy (to talk about why your dating isn't going well) $85 a session

Make-up - $150

Drinks with friends in hopes of meeting guys - $60.00

Astrology reading (to find out if you're going to meet someone finally) $150.00

Just to be on line for six months can cost you anywhere from $180 a month to $240. Not to mention that trolling on-line dating sites is a full-time job in and of itself. All told, a single woman in New York can spend upwards of $3,000 a year, and that's before she even gets a date. Then comes the whole issue of do you go dutch or does he pay for dinner. You date a lot of guys who want to split the check, that can cost you another $3,000. Of course you can tell yourself that you would have spent that money anyway eating alone.

If you can take out a home improvement loan, why can't you take out a loan for dating? It stands to reason, that if the bank will pay for upkeep on your home or apartment, they should pay for the upkeep on your person, particularly in New York, where women outnumber men. Frankly, I'm too old to move to Alaska, hoping to find a man. And I don't ski, so that lets out going out to somewhere like Colorado, plus I'm too much of a city girl. And anyway that costs money.

I completely understand now why women go on The Bachelor. At least they're paying you while you're trying to meet someone, instead of the other way around.

Thanks for stopping by!

EKM

Memories of Dad

Today would have been my dad's 91st birthday. Every year in February (when he passed) and in May, I remember what a unique individual my father was. He's the reason that I was given the name Elizabeth. His grandmother was also named Elizabeth and my father insisted that I be given her name, instead of Kerri Victoria which is what my mother wanted to name me. So I was christened Elizabeth Kerri as a compromise, but called Kerri for most of my life because, hey, my mother was the one who went through labor.

My father was a handsome man, not conventionally handsome like Clark Gable or Gary Cooper, but handsome nonetheless. If you look at pictures of me when I was about six and my dad when he was a young man, and the resemblance is amazing. I remember my freshman year of college, he came to visit me up at Syracuse to take back some of my stuff. We went to see a play in the drama department, and I got to introduce him to some of my classmates. My friend Gwenne pulled me aside later to declare that 'your dad is a fox!' which kind of creeped me out at the time.

I mean it's one thing for me to think my dad is attractive, another thing for a friend to think so!

I used to envy the fact that my dad's initials spelled a word and mine didn't. His name was Victor Ian Mahon (VIM) and my uncle's initials were RAM for Richard Arnam Mahon. My father was the sweetest man on the planet. I don't ever remember him getting angry or raising his voice to me. Despite occasionally threatening to spank me, I knew it was only talk. Even in high school, when my brother had to come get me because I was so drunk, and I had to tell my father, he didn't yell at me, which just made me feel worse.

He was absolutely devoted to my mother. I think the reason why I'm still single is because I want a man to love me the way my father loved my mother, and I'm not willing to settle for anything less.

I was a total Daddy's girl when I was little which is understandable since I was his only child. We spent alot of time together when I was younger. Even though he worked two jobs, he would stop by Woolworth's on 145th Street (when they still had a lunch stand) and pick me up a hamburger when I was home from school during vacation. He took me to see my first ballet (Sleeping Beauty with Fernando Bujones and Cynthia Gregory) and my first Broadway show (Sweeney Todd with the incomparable Angela Lansbury and Victor Garber).

He even tried to teach me how to ride a tricycle but I much preferred to have him pull me in the tricycle. Even as a child, I knew that I would one day need a chauffeur.

A World War II veteran, he was remarkably close-mouthed about the war. I had no idea he fought in the Battle of the Bulge until after he died. He should have gotten a purple heart for being wounded by a German soldier, but my dad was so modest that if they had tried to give it to him, he probably would have refused it or lost it. He was even offered the chance at officer candidacy school after he was drafted, but he turned it down because he didn't want to make the army his career. I think he didn't talk about the war with me, because I was a girl, and he wanted to protect me from the horrors that he had seen.

When I think of my father, I think of him sitting in the recliner in the living room of our house upstate reading a book, or watching TV, a glass of Scotch burning a hole in the finish on the coffee table. My love of reading comes from both of my parents, our house upstate was filled with books.

The things my father and I had in common was our stubborness, our hate of the sun (for two people who tanned so easily we both spent most of our time in the shade), swimming, reading, and our love of money for different reasons. He loved saving it, and I love spending it! Whenever I smell lilacs I think of him, we used to have a lilac bush outside our kitchen door upstate.

When I cut my hair in 9th grade, he was so upset that he cried. Being a spoiled brat, I gathered all the hair up and gave it to him. When we sold our house upstate, I discovered that he'd kept one of my curls in his desk drawer.

Happy Birthday Daddy. I love you.

If it ain't broke.......

This is Josh Lucas, my future husband, in a still from the new movie Poseidon, which I had the chance to see at the Tribeca Film Festival. I love Josh in spite of the fact that he's in one of the worse movies of the summer.

Let me just say that I have no problem with remakes, as long as there is a good reason for re-making the picture. Personally, with all the screenwriters out there struggling to get deals, I think it's stupid to keep churning out high budget remakes but what do I know. I work as an Executive Secretary not a studio executive.

Sometimes with a remake, particularly if it's based on a book, you have a chance to take a different take on it like Postman Always Rings Twice or the tv version of From Here to Eternity that was 6 hours long.

But remaking The Poseidon Adventure? Twice, if you include the 4 hour CBS mini-series. I have fond memories of the first time I saw The Poseidon Adventure. We had just gotten cable tv and it was on HBO. I thought it was wonderful, and scary. At the time, in the seventies, the disaster movie was incredibly popular. Remember Airport? Towering Inferno? Earthquake?

The things I remember about the original movie besides Pamela Sue Martin's hot pants, and the Mad magazine spoof were Shelley Winters, as the former swim champion, swimming to her death, and Gene Hackman as the defrocked priest challenging God as he opened a hatch. The two things I'm going to take away from this version are how hot Josh Lucas and Kurt Russell are, and the weird moment Andre Braugher and Fergie from The Black Eyed Peas have, which comes out of nowhere, as if the director realized that they were too well known not to have something.

Yes, the special effects are great, just as they were in Titanic, but there is no character development. And you can pretty much figure out who is going to be the next to get killed. I have no idea why Richard Dreyfuss is in this movie, unless he has kids in college. Emmy Rossum plays her role pretty much the same way she did Christine in Phantom. Kurt Russell is heroic as always, and did I mention Josh Lucas is hot?

I hate to say it, but save your money and go see X-Men or rent the original film.

Why I walk

Every year for the past seven years, I have done the Aidswalk and this year is no exception.

Why do I walk? One reason is that I worked with an actor when I was just starting out who later died of the disease. I walk because although people with HIV are able to live longer and fuller lives, there is still no cure. I walk because Aids has spread throughout Africa and Asia. I walk because there are people who believe that Aids is no longer or a problem, or because it's no longer fashionable to support Aids. That's why I walk, and will continue to walk every year.

If anyone would like to sponsor me, please go to Aidswalk.net, type in Elizabeth Mahon, and then go on from there. Or here's the link to my personal page: http://aidswalknewyork2006.kintera.org/elizabethkmahon

Thanks for stopping by,

EKM

Why I want to be Nancy Drew when I grow up

I first picked up a Nancy Drew book when I was about seven or eight years old. My mother bought me a copy of The Secret of Shadow Ranch. I had never read a mystery before. My reading up till that point had consisted of Amelia Bedelia, Ramona and Little House on the Prairie books. In fact, the book scared me a little, and it took a while before I picked up another Nancy Drew. Once I finally did, I was totally hooked.

I read all 58 Nancy Drews that had been published at that point. Nancy was who I wanted to be when I grew up. She was confident, smart, poised, had a great sense of humor. She could do anything, play the bagpipes, fly a plane, pretend to be a puppet, tap dance. Whatever was required to solve the mystery, she was some how able to do. She had two best friends, Bess and George who were devoted to her, and who despite their own concerns and fears, were right there with her in the thick of things. She had a loving, devoted Dad who thought the world of her, a housekeeper who treated her like a daughter, and a cute dog. Not to mention, a boyfriend who had endless amounts of patience to wait for her to find time to spend with him. She traveled around the world solving mysteries in exotic places like Peru, Hawaii, India, Scotland (trust me Scotland was exotic to a nine year old, and if you've ever been there you'd know what I mean).

Her father never questioned her judgement, he just gave her the money and let her go. I loved that. Plus she didn't have to go to school, and adults came to her to solve mysteries even though she was only 18. I thought when I'm eighteen, I'm going to be that fabulous!

My love of Nancy Drew extended to wanting to be her. I used to make my friends play Nancy Drew. Of course, I was Nancy and they were Bess and George. Playing Nancy helped me make the decision that I wanted to act when I grew up. I loved Nancy Drew so much that I was so pissed off when they cast Pamela Sue Martin as Nancy instead of me (even though I would look horrible as a blonde). Of course, the show sucked (and not just because they didn't cast me). It was as if the producers had no understanding of what made the books so great. Plus the Ned Nickerson was so not hot (you just knew Ned was a hottie).

My first rejection letter as a writer came when I attempted to come up with my own mystery series starring a teen detective named Kerri (surprise, surprise) who solved mysteries. I submitted it to Grosset and Dunlap, who sent me a very nice rejection letter. If RWA Pro existed back then, I would have had my pin at the ripe old age of ten.

So I have Nancy to thank for my twin careers as actress and writer. Of course, I don't solve mysteries, but Nancy taught me to think for myself, and to trust my own judgement and instincts. She made every girl who read her believe that they could do anything, if she did it.

Sometimes I find myself thinking in a certain situation, 'What would Nancy Drew do?' How would she solve this problem?

Last year, Nancy turned 75 years young, with a new look, and a new series of adventures. Nancy's kept up with the times. She's gone to college, become an interactive computer game, and now she's so hip, that's she even become Manga!

Two books have come out recently that share my love of Nancy Drew. The first is Girl Sleuth by Melanie Rehak, an excellent history of the Stratemeyer syndicate and the three people who were largely responsible for who Nancy became, Edward Stratemeyer who came up with the concept, his daughter Harriet who carried on leading the company and was responsible for revising the first 36 books, and Mildred Wirt Benson who actually ghost-wrote the books for the first 25 years of the series.

The second is Susan Kandel's Not A Girl Detective, the second in her Cece Caruso mystery series. This one deals with a missing painting of the woman who modeled for the covers, and has lots of fun, interesting facts.

So, I raise a cyber class of champagne to Nancy Drew for helping mold me into the woman I've become.

Thanks for stopping by.

EKM

Weekend Eye Candy

Since Megan keeps posting Sean Bean and Clive Owen pictures, I thought I would put a shout out for my boys. Ladies, here is your weekend eye candy:

The Aussie from GH, Ingo Rademacher as Jasper Jax

The very handsome James Purefoy

Hottie Shemar Moore from Criminal Minds

Le pant, Le heave

May Horoscope

Julie Hill of Hill Media does Astrology for Writers, Editors and Filmmakers over at Publisher's Marketplace. This is what is (hopefully) up for me this month.

Libra: You have many irons in the fire and may be exhausted. Put off until next month what you can. Put off signing contracts until you get all the expert advice you need. Remember: lawyers and publishing are strange bedfellows, to say the least.

Scorpio: If a woman is involved in any of your deals, she can be trusted. Your intuition is your best resource now, so doing things that may not be logical are actually the better course of action. The old " trust your gut" applies. That's where the $$$ is.

Cool Beans! Keeping my fingers crossed that I sign with a lovely woman agent (not that men can't be great agents. I don't want anyone to think I'm being discriminatory), and a lovely editor (see above. Chris Keeslar, I'm told, is a great editor).

And We're Back

Blogger gave me fits yesterday, so I was unable to upload this picture of my fashion icon, Sarah Jessica Parker looking like a fashion don't at the Metropolitan Museum of Art Costume Gala. The Costume Gala is one of the biggest events in the social calendar here in New York. How do I know this? Well that's what everyone says. Every year, it seems like there are more and more stars attending than the usual run of the mill mix of old money and new money at the event. This year's gala is called Anglomania and celebrates British fashion which is why SJP is wearing this godawful dress by Alexander McQueen. I'm not sure what I hate about it the most, the tartan portion or the dress underneath. It just doesn't gel together. And the shoes are atrocious. I have to had to her though, she's not afraid to take fashion risks. Personally I would have run for the hills rather than put that on.

So, the Supreme Court of the U.S. has said that Anna Nicole Smith has the right to pursue her claim to her late husband's estate in court. Wow that must have been some session. Why do I feel like they probably spent all of ten minutes debating this? I'm sure it particularly pained Ruth Ginsburg. Hard to believe that this case will ever be spoken of in the same breath as Roe vs. Wade or Brown vs. Board of Education.

The other major news latel is that the author of Opal Mehta has had her book contract canceled by Little Brown. Apparently there have been allegations that passages have been plagiarized from other books including the Princess Diaries. Man, that photographic memory can really cause problems can't it?

As for my life, I sent out a partial on Monday, and I've sent out 3 more queries to agents. Busily working on my new YA partial. I'm also making time for a social life. I went to a wonderful benefit here in NY for the 14th Street Y that was held at a restaurant called Candela, which if you're in NY and you want a really romantic restaurant, you should go here. Also the food is fantastic as well. I'm not afraid to say I looked hot. I wore one of my DVF dresses, putting the twins on display. I blew out my hair (or rather I paid someone else to do it for me!). I was shocked at how long it was. Anyone who has really curly hair knows that your hair looks much shorter when it's curly than when it's straight. Well, my hair is almost to the end of my shoulder blades, that's how long it is. I'm sensing a haircut in my future.

Much money was raised for the Y, and I was very proud of one of my close friends who was the co-chair of the event, she did a fantastic job.

So that's it for me so far this week. Oh, I got to see James Gandolfini, John Travolta, Laurence Fishburne and John Malkovich while I worked at the Tribeca Film Festival on Sunday and Monday, so it's been a good week so far.

Thanks for stopping by!

EKM

Adaptation

Well, I just sent off my partials to five agents, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that my baby finds favor with one or two of the agents that I sent it to. I feel confident that it's the best shape possible, and a few reads by several people who's word I trust. I've almost finished my other partial, but I've been thinking about how whether or not to do another Shakespeare adaptation.

One of my favorite movies is 10 Things I Hate About You with Julia Stiles and Heath Ledger. To me it's the perfect adaptation of Taming of the Shrew set in a high school. I don't think I could top that, even though it's a movie and I'm writing a novel. I would have to do a reverse gender sort of thing and have Kent be the Shrew and Patricia be the Tamer (get it Kate/Kent, Petruchio/Patricia). Romeo and Juliet would be an obvious choice but again it makes me think of Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes, plus in the movie and the play they end up dead. A bit of a downer for a novel, unless they just break up at the end.

Other possibilities include Much Ado or Tempest. I'm trying to avoid the plays where the heroine has to dress up as a boy unless of course it's on stage for a play. That I could swing.

What all this thinking has done is made me realize just how hard it can be to adapt something for a contemporary audience. For ever Clueless, there's also a Wuthering Heights. Did anyone see this dreck on MTV a few years ago with Erika Christensen and some guy who's name I can't even remember? It was god awful but pretty.

So here are a few of my favorite adaptations:

1. Clueless - Amy Heckerling's version of Emma is priceless. I've watched it over and over again, and it's still pleasurable.

2. Ten Things I Hate About You - Heath Ledger. Enough said.

3. Cruel Intentions - the original version not the straight to video sequels. This is the movie where Ryan Phillipe and Reese Witherspoon fall in love. Who would have thought that an epistolary novel would adapt so well to a snooty New York prep school and the cruel intentions of two students? Gossip Girl owes a lot to this movie.

4. O - This was the version of Shakespeare's Othello set in a boarding school with Julia Stiles that was delayed from being released because of the shootings at Columbine.

Wow, that's not alot. It just goes to show you that adapting is incredibly hard. If you've read Susan Orlean's book, The Orchid Thief, and then seen Adaptation, you have a pretty good idea why that movie was so spot on.