Why I am not watching The Bachelor Anymore

This past Monday started a whole new season of The Bachelor and for the first time since the show started in 2002, I am not watching. That's right, I didn't watch and I didn't DVR it. The Bachelor used to be fun, like a more glamorous version of speed dating. Fabulous dates that would never happen in real life, glamorous clothes, uber-romantic at first. I actually wanted to believe that when The Bachelor went down on one knee that true love woudl follow. Yes, I am a romantic sap that way. But no the bloom is off the rose so to speak.

Why? Is it because out of 19 seasons, only one couple has gotten married? Nope! Is it because some of The Bachelors have been complete tools (Travis Stork, Jesse Palmer, Prince Lorenzo Borghese) I'm not watching it because after the whole Jason proposes to Melissa and then dumps her on national television to get together with Molly I'm done.

Now, I know both Jason and Melissa have said that there relationship was over before the After the Final Rose special but there was no reason for him to have to tell her on national television that he was in love with bachelorette No. 2, particularly when he apparently had been denying to Melissa that was the reason why they broke up. And then whining that the producers made him do it.

Then we move on to Jillian's season where our new Bachelor Jake whined about how Wes had a girlfriend but then couldn't prove it. But heck it got him more screen time after he got dumped and then got him the gig as the next Bachelor. I think he's fake and has about as much charisma as a Ken doll. No, I take it back, Ken doll's have more charisma. Not that I thought sleazy Wes was a charmer. It was clear that he was only on the show to promote himself. And then there was foot fetish Tanner. And finally the man Jillian chose, who it turned out was doing half of Chicago while he was supposed to have left the show for his 'job.' Yes, I know that supposedly they are happy now, but it was just too much.

And now the producers have created a fake scandal about a bachelorette and one of the producers having a sexual relationship but they have no footage of this alleged relationship. You can read all abou the alleged scandal on Reality Steve.

But the final reason why is that I'm tired of the fact that in all of these seasons, not once have we had a Bachelor or Bachelorette of color. Forget about the fact that there is usually one token who never gets any screen time and generally gets booted off after the first two episodes. In the 21st century, I find it ridunkulous that they keep casting only whites. Why no attractive, well-to-do black, Asian, Latin or Indian bachelor or bachelorette?  There is more diversity on BRAVO or any of the VH-1 reality dating shows than on ABC. An argument can of course be made that the Bachelor or Bachelorette who does get cast does not want to date interacially which is of course there perogative but since they are going on national television to find a mate, you think they might be more open to meeting people outside their comfort zone, which in this case means race. I'm not the only one wondering about this. Check out this article in yesterday's The Huffington Post.

And that is why I'm no longer watching The Bachelor.

I officially hate this show!

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I knew the whole story about what went down last night on The Bachelor two weeks ago, but watching it last night was painful. Seriously, Jason Mesnick has now surpassed Prince Lorenzo Borghese and Alex Michel as the worst bachelor in history. In fact I have more respect for even Brad Womack now.

Seriously, if Jason was so broken up about letting Molly go, he should never have proposed to Melissa. He should have done what Charlie O'Connell did and dated them both in the real world before he made his decision. There was no reason for him to tell Molly that he was in love with Melissa, then tell Melissa how much in love with her he was, and then two months later break up with her on national television.

I don't care what his contract said. He should have manned up and refused to break up with Melissa in front of the cameras. And you could tell from Melissa's reaction that she had no idea why he was breaking up with her. Jason told Jimmy Kimmel that he and Melissa had already broken up before the show, but if that were true, he did as lousy a job of it in private as he did on TV, because clearly Melissa was blind-sided. And all that crying? Seriously, I have never seen a man cry so much in my life. The guy should keep his day job because he is the worst actor in the world. From on the look on Chris Harrison's face, I'm amazed that he refrained from either punching Jason or telling him off. He just looked so uncomfortable to have to listen to that conversation.

And then the whole spiel with Molly? Do the producers really expect us to believe that Jason and Molly have had no contact via email or phone since the show ended? Either that or she's the world's biggest wimp to take him back so easily. She paid lip-service to being confused and having so many questions, but it didn't take long for her hand to be on his knee, and for them to be swapping spit on camera.

I believe that Jason told the producers that he wanted to break up with Melissa, and why, that he still had feelings for Molly. They sounded Molly out before the show, because how embarrassing would that have been if Molly had rejected Jason (which she should have)? Jason and Molly started emailing or talking and then they filmed the ATFR rose special.

Jason said on People.com, that he and Melissa just couldn't communicate after they left New Zealand, that the conversations were different. You mean, because producers were no longer feeding them topics? Seriously they spent the night together in the fantasy suite. Unless they were schtupping, I assume they talked that night. The ony reason conversations would have been difficult was because Jason soon realized that he had made a mistake and wanted Molly or Reality Steve's version which is that he wanted Molly all along and just picked Melissa because producer's asked him too, and he couldn't continue to go along with the charade.

Either way, Jason is the most fickle individual on the planet. And I wouldn't trust him so easily if I were Molly.

The Bachelor Conspiracy

Sorry I've been such a lazy blogger. Between looking for a job, posting over at Scandalous Women, and working on the changes my agent wants on my book proposal, I just haven't had the energy to blog regularly.

But The Bachelor has been pretty darn good this season. And now a certain blogger named Reality Steve has ignited a bit of controversy over on his blog. He claims that he has inside information about how the whole season went down and why Jason picks the woman he does and what happens afterwards. He's been threatening whether or not to reveal all before the season finale and the two After the Final Rose specials that ABC has scheduled.

Seriously I haven't seen so many theories since I used to read books about the conspiracies behind the assassination of JFK. People are going crazy leaving comments on Reality Steve's blog and on other message boards speculating on what really went down. Everything from Jason knew one of the contestants before the show started, he gets engaged to one woman, and then gets engaged to someone else, why Deanna has come back, one woman gets pregnant, no another woman gets pregnant, all the contestants are plants etc.

It is so fascinating to read, it's better than a thriller. I've never seen so much interest in a Bachelor before. For some reason, people are particularly invested this season, probably because Jason is a single dad and they feel for him. Ratings are up for this installment of The Bachelor after several lackluster seasons (Prince Lorenzo anyone?).

Personally, I'm rooting for Jillian but I suspect she gets booted next week, and he's left with Molly and Melissa. I already sense there is more to Melissa's story than we are getting, particularly since her parents didn't appear on the Hometown Dates. None of her friends seem to know her family and her brother didn't even show up. She mentioned that her parents never even went to a Dallas Cowboys game when she cheered for them. Also her friends seemed to indicate that she hadn't been truthful about her relationships, since she stated that she was with someone for 7 years but hadn't dated in three (she's only 25) but her friends made it seem like she'd dated alot of jerky guys.

Oh and interesting that Jason didn't mention to Naomi's dad when he was going on about Jesus, that he was Jewish.

The Bachelor: What the Hell?

You know I forget how desperate some women can be until I watch another episode of The Bachelor and then I remember, and I convince myself that I will never, ever act that way around a guy. Seriously reading a dude a poem that you've written? Telling him that you have created a vision board about him? Reciting statistics from his MySpace page? (Well that one actually worked because Shannon the Stalker is still on the show). I get that you need to stand out when you are one of 25 women on the show but come on? Nikki got the first impression rose for not seeming desperate.

And what was the point of making the women put the name in a box of someone they wanted booted off and then keeping the woman who got the most votes? Personally, I would have refused to do it, because it could get nothing but ugly because of it. Loved Megan calling the girls assholes on TV!

And what is this about Deanna coming back and telling Jason that she made a mistake? Jason has said in interviews that he didn't know that Deanna and Jesse had broken up until halfway thru filming, so when did she just pop up? And is she sincere or just looking for 15 more minutes of fame.

Seriously just when I think I'm done with this show, it sucks me back in.

Things I don't Understand

How American Idol could be such a snoozefest last night? When Jason Castro, who looks like most of the guys I see busking on the subway in New York, can give one of the better performances with a ukelele, you know there is something wrong with the world. I came home last night after my two salsa classes (this time I wasn't sick from all the spiral turns we did) itching to watch AI on my DVR. And then I turned it on. Seriously the two performers I hate most, Kristi Lee 'I sold my horse to audition for Idol' Cook and Jason Castro sang the best. What the hell happened? I blame the whole inspirational song theme frankly.

And then I turn on GH to find Michael Corinthos Jr. has been shot in the head one month after he accidentally shot his father's girlfriend in the heart and left her for dead. I'm getting a little sick of General Sopranos that Bob Guza has been writing for the past 12 years. From Claudia Zacchara lusting after her half-brother, to an evil psychopath being transformed into the brother of one of the core characters, this show sucks. On a daily basis. Guza claims that he wants to show the fall-out from a life in the mob. How about this, why don't you have Sonny and Jason go to jail for once? Each of them have been shot like 50 times and lived, their wives and girlfriends have been shot and threatened, kidnapped because of the mob. I think we all get it, being the mob sucks.

What happened to Love in the Afternoon? There's no love on GH, just people sneaking around and lying to each other, hiding pregnancies, refusing to have brain tumors removed so that they can see their dead fiancees, casual sex and creepy evil doctors who seem to have a different speciality every day. And they wonder why people read romance!

I don't expect my soaps to reflect reality but I do expect them to at least make some sense and have continuity from one day to the next.

And is wrong that I think less of Andy Baldwin from The Bachelor that he's dating Marla Maples?

When did being a rock star mean that washing your hair was now optional?

How does one actually become an 'accidental' mistress? Does it involve tripping and falling on it? Or not knowing that the guy was married before you slept with him? Or had a girlfriend or was engaged?

Thank god I'm seeing the new Stones film tonight!

EKM

Holy Granola Batman!

Wow, Marchana, the only woman of color, on The Bachelor has made it to top six contestants on this show, and already the hating has begun (sorry I couldn't find a better picture on the ABC web-site, this is from last week when she got a fat lip playing rugby). The comments have run the gamut to 'he had to pick her or be called racist' to how unattractive some people find her. Here is a quick recap of what happened. Matt, Marchana and Holly had a dinner date at Matt's 'bachelor' pad. There was a rose on the line, one girl was going to have to go home immediately after the date. Can I just say how sucky this whole idea is? I've hated it ever since they started it back during Travis Dork's days.

Anywhoo, Holly is telling Matt exactly what she thinks he wants to hear. Stuff like 'Oh I was just thinking about moving to London before I met you,' and 'I could be happy on a deserted island as long as I was with you.' Seriously, do women really think that a man wants to hear crap like that? No wonder I'm still single. Meanwhile Marchana impressed Matt by actually being mature and telling him that she was there to take a risk on love. The upshot is that Matt kept Marchana and the rest of the girls freaked out because it meant that no one was guaranteed a rose, no matter how well their date or one on one time went.

Of course, next week's previews indicate that Marchana turns into Omarosa and gives her impression of the 'angry black woman,' which means that her days might be numbered. Which would be a shame, because I think that Matt actually likes her and is intrigued by her. While she likes him and wants to get to know him better, she doesn't seem to be giving him any kind of party line. And she hasn't either sung for him, showed off her breasts, done handsprings, or bitten open a tin can. All of which makes her tops in my book.

And I missed my Kristi on Dancing with the Stars because my stupid Time Warner Cable DVR crapped out and I had to reboot which cancelled the taping. So I'm going to have to watch her and Jason Taylor's performances on that little tiny screen on line.

EKM

Dancing away with the Stars

So last night was the premiere of the 6th season of Dancing with the Stars, my most favorite television show of all. Seriously, I love this show even more than American Idol and Top Chef, which just goes to show you how lowbrow I am. What I love about it, is that it's celebrities out of their comfort zone. It is live, there are no re-takes, if you make a mistake, it will be replayed on YouTube for eternity.

So why do B, C and D list celebrities do it? Because it's fun. They get to wear pretty costumes and dance with hot men and women, and their significant others can't really complain about it, because its dancing, not a love scene with kissing and partial nudity. Also they are learning something, how to dance. And possibly reviving their careers like Joey Fatone, Mario Lopez, and Ian Ziering (seriously had any of you seen Steve Saunders since 90210 ended?).

My money so far is on Mario and Jason Taylor. Mario because he can really dance, although Mario Lopez might wanna watch out because I think this Mario is trying to make time with Karina, and Jason Taylor just because he's big and yummy. Penn Jilette and Adam Carolla will be long gone soon, and Steve Guttenberg will be this seen's John Ratzenberger or Marie Osmond, you know the celebrity who stays on long past their sell by date because they are cute and try hard.

Then I caved and watched the season premiere of The Bachelor. I know that I said I would stop wathcing this show after Brad Womack, but come on, the new Bachelor is British and cute, I had to watch, if only to see one of the Bachelorettes hand him her panties before she passed out. Yes, she gave him her panties. At least, I hope they weren't the ones she was wearing. I could be wrong, which makes it even more disgusting.

Seriously, is this what women have come to? Giving a man they just met and don't really know their panties after playing footsie and practically feeling him up? You know there is flirting and then there is just being a skank. And panty girl crossed the line. I have to give Matt Grant, the Bachelor, credit for not picking her to stay around to add drama to the show (although from the previews, we get to see angry black woman in the next episode. I know, couldn't skirt that stereotype!).

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Why can't The Bachelor....

be Black? Or Asian or Hispanic? Anything but another white dude?

No offense to Brad Womack, the current Bachelor who is cute, and funny and seems less of a tool than some of the previous dubious titleholders, but I was thinking last night as I watching the show that it just seems like the same old, same old with this show.

You know, girls with more cleaveage than sense who spend however many weeks either throwing themselves at the Bachelor or playing coy. And then being catty about each other.

At one point, they were at the race track and a player for the San Diego Chargers came in named Shaun. Really attractive black guy and the girls were all atwitter, and I thought why have they never had a Bachelor of another race? Is the audience for this show too conservative? Considering that the lone minority contestant for this show was gone after the first episode it makes you wonder (Seriously does ABC even asks these guys whether or not they've ever dated outside their race? Or are they too busy being politically correct?).

No minority has ever made it to the final four or the final two. I'm not counting Tessa from last season's Bachelor because she's Eurasian. But seriously, this show might be more interesting if they mixed it up a bit. There has to be some hot, rich, Asian or Hispanic entrepreneur looking for love.

Perhaps the reason there hasn't been an African-American bachelor is ABC doesn't want to get the hate mail from black women who are pissed that he's on a show with white women! Too OJ or Tiger Woods for them. But then again, on VH-1, Flavor of Love was very mixed bunch of racially diverse hoochies as was Rock of Love and I Love New York. It is easier for cable with its smaller audience to be more diverse?

Still, it's time that this show started reflecting more the cultural diversity of this country. Heck, Private Practice and Grey's Anatomy are more culturally diverse than this show. Even Dancing with the Stars. If ABC can put on a show based on the GEICO cavemen, why not a Bachelor who isn't white?

EKM