Now I've seen everything!

Okay, so I'm sitting at my night job last night just before Top Chef, winking at any guy on Match.com that doesn't look like a serial killer when I saw something I've never seen before on any dating site.

A guy wearing a blond wig and a dress.

Seriously, I know someone who once went out with a guy who then ended up on America's Most Wanted, and we've all had experiences of meeting people who look nothing like their pictures, but this was a first for me.

According to his profile, yes, he does like to dress like a woman, which is totally okay. I give him mad props for actually putting it out there in his profile right up front, instead of springing it on a woman after they'd been dating for awhile. And it must have taken a great deal of courage to do that.

But here's the problem, the only pictures in the profile were of him wearing a cheap wig and a dress. No pictures of him in guy mode. And frankly, the dude is one fugly female. I don't know how many women have responded to his profile, but I have a feeling if they're turned off it probably has less to do with the fact that he cross-dresses and more to do with his appearance. I mean seriously, unless he plans to show up on the first date in a dress, he should have two pictures in his profile, one as a man and one as a woman.

Of course, it could turn out that the whole thing is a huge joke. I have no idea. I could be worrying about this guy, sitting home alone, for nothing.

Anyone else had any strange experiences with on-line dating sites? Who am I kidding? Of course, you have!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Top Chef Day!

Yeah, tonight is the first night for season 3 of Top Chef and I'm so excited. In fact I'm so excited that I hope that I get to write the show tonight at my night job even though it means I probably won't get home until 2 or 3 in the morning.

But more than that I am so jealous that my good friend KMJ got to meet Sam Talbot from Top Chef 2 in Union Square yesterday. Here she is snuggling up with my future boy toy. Thank god, she had a cell phone cam.

KMJ, get your hands off him, he's mine! God, he's hot. I'm getting all sweaty just thinking about it and it's freezing today.

Apparently, the rest of the Top Chef gang was there: Ted Allen, Padma, and my other man, Tom Colicchio, who I would totally do if he weren't married.

Here are Padma, Ilan and Sam getting ready for a Top Chef challenge, which apparently Ilan won. Once again my boy Sam was robbed!
So, after watching last week's one-off, between Season 1 and Season 2, I've come to the conclusion that Season 2 was a bunch of divas. Just watching Harold, the winner of the first season, skillfully make his dish with no drama, was a pleasure. I can't wait to get together with friends to eat in his new restaurant Perilla which is getting rave reviews.

I will however give kudos to Ilan who realized that he's not quite ready to have his own kitchen. I don't know what that means for the money that he won, if he's got it socked away some where for the day he does open his own place. Oh, and I found it amusing that Marcel accused Ilan of being a one trick pony with his Spanish food, when Marcel is incapable of making a dish without foam!

It'll be interesting to see where the third season lies: will they be the professionals of Season 1 or the drama queens of Season 2 or somewhere in between.

Enjoy and thanks for reading!

EKM

Guilty Pleasure: Grease 2

Yesterday was the 25th anniversary of the release of Grease 2. Yes, I can hardly believe it folks but it's true. I saw Grease 2 when it first came out in the movie theater. I went with a group of friends from my trip the previous summer to London. This being the 80's, one of the friends felt the need to light up a doobie in the movie theater. Yup, you could smoke at the movies back then. Plus, the theater was almost empty.

Which was a shame because Grease 2 is a an out and out hoot and a half. I can't tell you how much I love this movie and Michelle Pfeiffer as Stephanie in it. Forget all her dramatic roles, to me, this was one of her best performances, plus she got to sing in it too. Who can forget her singing 'Cool Rider'? where she describes her perfect guy.

And then there's Maxwell Caulfield, the brooding new kid, Michael Carrington, in school from England. The man who just wants to be Stephanie's cool rider. Sigh! I had a huge crush on Maxwell Caulfield. I even watched The Colby's, the horrible spin-off of Dynasty that was only notable for Stephanie Beacham as Sable.

The rest of the cast weren't slouches either, Adrien Zmed, Lorna Luft. How can you not love a movie that has a whole song and dance number in a bowling alley? Or in biology class? Plus, the final production number, during the Calendar Girls number when Stephanie thinks Michael Carrington is dead, but she sees him a dream, is awesome.

Personally I think that instead of another pointless rival of Grease on Broadway, which always ends up being a mish-mash of the movie and the original stage production, they should do Grease 2 instead. I mean why not? So far on Broadway, we have Tarzan, Mary Poppins, Legally Blonde, and now Xanadu, all movies. And Xanadu is another craptastic movie from the 80's. If they can turn that into a Broadway musical, they can certainly do Grease 2.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Monday Real Estate Porn

I've lived in New York all my life, and I know the city pretty well, but every now and then I see something that I've never seen before. Case in point, this chateau looking building on 106th and CPW.

The picture on the left doesn't do it justice. Apparently some developer has turned it into a condominium building, where the apartments start at like $4.5MM which is insane because 106th and CPW isn't exactly the creme de la creme of Central Park West. I mean Jerry Seinfeld and Madonna have their apartments approximately 20 blocks down. And 106th Street itself runs the gamut of nice block, bad block, nice block all the way to the park.

Still, if I won mega millions, I would totally buy an apartment in this building. One of the floor plans is for an apartment in one of the towers, so that the living room is completey round. How cool is that? And another apartment is so huge, that the master bedroom has not one, but two walk-in closets. That's no joke in New York, where closet space is at a premium. I would buy the apartment just for the closet space alone!

If you want to see more, check out the web-site at www.455cpw.com, and you'll see what I mean. Commence drooling!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Embarassing Celebrity Crushes

Well, I've been tagged by Marley and I'm supposed to upload photos of my bookshelves, but it's going to have to wait because I don't have a digital camera so I took photos with a disposable one and I have to pick up the photos from Duane Reade.

So in the meantime, I thought I'd talk about celebrity crushes, which is kind of timely since one of my celebrity crushes just retired this week from television. Yes, Mr. Bob Barker was one of my celebrity crushes from when I was a child. I used to watch Truth or Consequences with my grandmother and for some reason, when I was five, I just thought Bob Barker was so good-looking. Looking back, I think it's because he kind of looked a little like my dad. Freud would have a field day with that one.

Before that apparently, I had a crush on this newscaster Jim Jensen. I don't remember this but my mother told me that whenever he was anchoring the news, I would stop whatever I was doing and go sit in front of the television set the minute I heard his voice.

Then of course, as I got older it was Donny Osmond all the way (I think I always sensed some thing was off with Michael Jackson) until I found out what it took to become a Mormon. There was no way I was going to be missing out on the drinking and the pre-marital sex, so he was out. Next was Parker Stevenson. While all the other girls my age were squealing for Shaun Cassidy, Parker won my heart. This was way because Kirstie Alley announced on national television that he gave her the 'Big O'.

Of course, everyone knows of my love for Timothy Dalton and James Purefoy but I have a confession to make. For a brief moment in time, I actually had a crush on Rick Astley, this English singer who looked like Archie. Embarassing, I know.

So, who are your most embarassing celebrity crushes?

Thanks for reading,

EKM

The Lake House

So I got home from work last night and decided to watch a movie since it's summer, and there's nothing on TV I particularly want to watch (that means you Mark Burnett and anything that you could possibly produce). Now I wish I had read a book instead. Anything had to have been better than this very lame movie.

The basic premise is that Keanu Reeves, who plays Alex moves into a lake house that his father built. He receives a letter in the mail from a previous tenant, Kate, played by Sandra Bullock. To make a long story short, it's 2004 when Alex is living in the house, and 2006 where she is. So two people corresponding seperated by two years. Oh, and somehow they also managed to talk to each telepathically as well.

My biggest problem with this movie was two fold, one it turns out that Alex and Kate have not only met in 2004 but they also dance together at her surprise birthday party and share a kiss. 2) once she knows who he is, why doesn't she google him? Come on, we've all googled people that we've gone out with, or want to go out with. She seems pretty computer literate. She wasn't even curious. However, she does send him a book about his father that is published in the future after his father dies. WTF?

And lastly but not least, I totally knew how it was going to end about halfway through when she waited for him at dinner in 2006 and he didn't show up.

Apparently this movie is based on a South Korean film, but it reminded me of a movie with Campbell Scott and Jennifer Jason Leigh called The Love Letter. If you haven't seen this movie you should, it's awesome. It's up there with Somewhere in Time. In this movie, Campbell Scott and Jennifer Jason Leigh are seperated by over 100 years. She lives during the Civil War. They communicate by leaving letters in an old desk that he buys. In fact, if I remember correctly he actually researches who she is (unlike Sandra Bullock).

So Lake House C-

The Love Letter A

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Random Thoughts

So yesterday was the anniversary of D-Day. I just want to give a shout-out to all the veterans who are still around who were on Omaha Beach. My dad fought in WWII, along with my uncle, although he was in the navy while my dad was in the army. My dad landed in the invasion of southern France, was in the Battle of the Bulge, and then got sent to Okinawa before the war ended. He never wanted to talk to me about the war, although being a total history geek, I wanted to know everything.

Now that I've read alot, and see movies like A Solider's Story, I can see why he didn't want to tell me about what it was like back when the armed forces were still segregated. It must have been really tough on him having to spend time down south while he was in training. My dad grew up in New York, where while things weren't great, they were certainly better than they were down south. He went to one of the best public schools, and had just gotten a civil service job at the post office when he was drafted, and my grandparents had just bought a town house in Hamilton Heights.

So it must have been serious culture shock for him when he arrived in Louisiana, between segregation and having to understand Cajun French, France must have been a relief in a way. He was finally doing what he had spent 2 years training to do.

I've always been proud that my dad and my uncle were veterans. So even though it's past Memorial Day and past D-Day, I salute both of them and the men they served with.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Footballers Wives$

Ah, it's Wednesday, also known as hump day here at The Lady Novelist. Two days of work behind me, and two days of work still ahead of me. Oy!

Thankfully tonight one of my guiltiest pleasures is on BBC America. Yes, Footballers Wives$ are back in all their naughty glory, including the addition of Joan Collins to the cast for the final season.

I cannot tell you how much I love this show. I was a huge fan of Dynasty back in the day, but this show is better. Maybe because Dynasty was about really really rich people who did something in the oil business. Footballers Wives$ on the other hand, is about the Earl's Park Football Club (soccer to us).

If you've ever picked up a copy of Hello! Magazine or the British version of OK, than you've seen the actual Footballers Wives$. Think of Victoria Beckham, wife of David Beckham. Now the lastest girlfriend to become famous just because she's dating a footballer is Colleen, who dates Wayne Rooney. She's 21, and from what I can see has done basically absolutely nothing. But she's on the cover of magazines, she's written an autobiography and now she's getting TV work as a what they call a presenter over there (we call them hosts. See George Bernard Shaw was right when he said we were two nations divided by a common language!).

The main reason to watch this show is Zoe Lucker's performance as Tanya Turner. I can't even begin to describe all the things that Tanya has done in the 4 series of the show that I've seen, but she's literally screwed one husband to death and switched babies in the hospital, taking the child of her lover and his ex-wife for hers, and leaving her own baby with the other mother! Even Joan Collins as Alexis Carrington wasn't that bad. And she didn't snort cocaine on a regular basis on Dynasty. Or sleep with her first husband's female agent.

Tanya Turner is the bad girl that you love to hate. The viewer lives vicariously through her. We don't condone what she does, but you can't wait to find out what she's going to do next.

ABC attempted to do an American version of the show with Lucy Lawless as Tanya. I don't see it. I could have been wrong about her performance, but we'll never know since so far, ABC has declined to pick up the pilot. Rumor has it the NFL put the kibosh on the show, and ABC succumbed to the pressure so as not to lose the right to the games on ESPN.

I'm not sure how well the show would have transferred. The wives of sports stars for the most part are invisible in this country. Apart from Kobe Bryant's wife or Magic Johnson, how many people can name the wife of a leading sports figure? They just aren't the celebrities the way they are in the UK. The players yes, but the wives for the most part seem to be invisible. They're almost like Army wives in a way. It would have been a completely different show.

Plus, I couldn't see them including any of the unsavory stuff that was in the show, like Noah, the gay footballer who turns to Christianity and reversion therapy to live the life of a heterosexual, or the scenes in Spain where a young girl is raped by one of the players. Too close to what happened with Kobe Bryant. Of course, without the unsavory stuff, the show would be boring.

What's interesting is that the men in Footballers Wives$ for the most part are the least interesting, apart from Bruno Milligan who is an abusive husband (picking up from where Jason left off). So far, we've seen two players have to go to a psychiatric facility, but not one of them seems to need rehab.

Still, thanks to DVD, whenever I need a fix of Tanya, Amber, and Lucy, I can just pop one in and relive their antics.

Thanks for reading!

EKM

P.S. And the fourth issue of the Buffy comic came out today too!

Rainy Days and Mondays

Well, after days of temperatures hovering in the high 80's, we've finally had some rain here in New York. I left work last night after writing America's Funniest Home Videos (the Bob Saget edition, does anyone find him funny?) and it was pouring outside. Luckily I had budgeted for a cab which I duly took home.

I went to listen to some jazz on Friday night at the Rose Center which is part of the American Museum of Natural History. They were supposed to be playing jazzed up versions of the Beatles but I couldn't identify a single song. Good sangria though. I drank two glasses and shared a table with two very friendly people. I had a minor celebrity sighting, Donald Maass was there with I guess his wife, and two women from his office. I declined to say hello.

Saturday was our monthly board breakfast meeting before our regularly scheduled meeting. Lots of stuff got done including the possibility of hooking up with a charity, and a discussion of putting together some sort of self-published book to sell to benefit the chapter. Several chapters have done this with great success, in particular the Beau Monde which has a great research book. We were however thinking of using our most valuable asset which is the city itself. So we were thinking of doing a book of love stories, real or imagined that have to do with New York City landmarks, interspersed with romantic information, like most romantic hotels, restaurants, places to kiss, bars, and other possibly historical tidbits about great couples like Diamond Jim Brady and Lillian Russell. Our secretary and I joked about doing a book called 'Great Sluts of New York'.

We had the lovely Lois Winston as our guest speaker. I had asked her to speak on contests, the pros and cons, just to give our members an idea of what to look for when entering a contest and what the advantages and disadvantages there are to them. It was very informative. And then it was work and more work over the weekend.

Goal this week is to finish the novella. I have 20 pages to go, including the love scene which should occupy at least 8 pages of that. I read a few pages at our meeting and it seemed to go over well. I'm kind of pleased with it. It's been a long time since I've written anything romance related.

I also have over 200 friends now at My Space. So come by and check it out:

www.myspace.com/elizabethkerrimahon.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Crazy Love

Everyone knows about Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuco. They had an affair while she was underage, he broke up with her, she shot his wife. Now allegedly they're back together.

Well, meet the 1950's equivalent. Instead of Amy Fisher, we have Burt Pugach, the man from whom 1-800-Shyster could have been invented. Burt, not very good-looking, but apparently smart and charismatic works as an ambulance chaser in the Bronx. He's also a film producer, and owns a night club. He spies Lnda Riss (the Mary Jo Buttafuco of our story, with tinges of Joey) on a park bench and decides than and there that he has to have her.

She's attractive in a Natalie Wood kind of way. She also comes from a broken home, with a mother who had to work to support them since her father apparently abandoned them with no support. So Linda like most girls of that era is looking for a husband who would be a good provider. So despite not finding Burt attractive, she goes out with him.

He puts on the full court press, taking her to work, picking her up at lunch, taking her out to dinner. You have to wonder when he found time to chase any ambulances. He's madly, passionately in love with her. She's impressed by the people he knows, his fancy car, airplane, and the night clubs that he takes her too.

Then she finds out he's married, and refuses to see him. He tells her he'll get a divorce but stalls. This goes on for two years while he is disbarred, and starts drinking heavily, imaging that she cheating on him. She refuses to give up the goods without a ring. He fakes a divorce. The upshot is, she finds out what a lying jerk he is, and dumps him, getting engaged to another man. Burt flips out and hires three guys to disfigure her by throwing lye in her face. She ends up virtually blind from the attack.

Now things get screwy. I won't go into too much detail, but you have to see this movie to believe it. Burt goes to jail, although he feels he doesn't deserve too, after all, he didn't actually cause the attack. While in prison, he writes her constantly. Meanwhile her world shrinks to the point of loneliness, and she faces a future of clipping coupons and cats. He gets out of prison, and manages to convince her to marry him.

Now when I first heard about this story, I couldn't believe it. Then I saw Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuco smooching for the cameras. So I thought, stop judging these people and see the film for yourself. So I went to a free screening last night, and I'm glad I did. Whatever draws Burt and Linda together, it seems to work for them.

The one moment that was telling for me was when Linda admitted that Burt sees her the way that she used to be, not as this disfigured woman. Of course, one can argue that the reason she's disfigured at all is because of him. But time seems to have stopped for both of them in 1959 when this all happened. Call it Crazy Love or what have you, but strangely it works for them. You could call it redemption or revenge on her part. I personally think that she married him because she felt that he owed her because of what he did to her, so taking care of her for the rest of her life was his punishment.

For him, I think it's the fact that she's elusive, she's there but she's not there. He seems to have her on some kind of pedestal. The ultimate dream girl for a not very good looking guy from the Bronx. A prize. The whole Madonna whore syndrome.

The movie is also a cautionary tale about what happens when mistake love and obsession, and you opt for economic and material in a relationship. It kind of made me afraid to date, to tell the truth.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Thursday Meme!

I've been tagged by Megan, so here goes!


Two names you go by:
1. Elizabeth
2. Kerri
2 1/2. Certain friends also call me Bitsy

Two things you are wearing right now:
1. salmon colored top
2. brown, cream, and salmon skirt from Ann Taylor loft


Two things you would want (or have) in a relationship:
1. Humor
2. Intelligence
2 1/2 Sex


Two of your favorite things to do:
1. Dance
2. Read

Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. More money
2. An agent
2 1/2 A boyfriend

Two pets you had/have:
1. guinea pig
2. collie

Two things you did last night:
1. worked
2. ate tomato soup

Two things you ate today:
1. soft shelled crab sandwich
2. cake


Two people you last talked to:
1. my editor at work
2. my friend who is in AZ

Two things you’re doing tomorrow:
1. write
2. go listen to jazz

Two longest car rides:
1. We went to the Montrael Expo when I was 3
2. Driving to Syracuse my freshman year

Two favorite holidays:

1. My birthday (should be a national holiday)
2. Christmas

Two favorite beverages:
1. Champagne
2. Is there any other?

Four things About ME!
Things you may not have known about me:
1. I actually studied ballet for seven years
2. I played Eliza Doolittle in Pygmalion Off-Off Broadway.
3. I have a memory like an elephant
4. When I was unemployed, I had a weird obsession with watching Charmed–every day at 9 a.m. on TNT I watched the show.

Four jobs I have had in my life:

1. waitress
2. travel agent
3. writer
4. Secretary

Four movies I would watch over and over:

1. The Lion in Winter
2. Persuasion
3. All About Eve
4. Gone with the Wine

Four places I have lived:

1. New York
2. Syracuse, NY
3. London
4. Accord, NY

Four of my favorite foods:
1. Lobster
2. Smoked salmon
3. Brie
4. Cherries, the darker the better

Four places I’d rather be right now:

1. At home watching the movies I just go from netflix
2. In an editor’s office signing a mega-contract
3. London, having tea
4. Australia

Okay, I'm now officially tagging Marley, Carolyn Turgeon, Anton Strout, and Mary F.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

R.I.P. Chumley's?

So I've been a little out of it when it comes to news in my own city. This is what happens when you hardly venture below 14th Street. I didn't know until I read Marianne's blog that Chumley's had closed due to a
chimney collapsing inside the building while people were still inside! According to the website Curbed demolition of the building is not being considered. Buildings was working with the owner and shoring company to stabilize the collapsed area, but Marianne noted that the building had been condemned. However, I recently read on Curbed that it might be able to be saved.

I have to confess that I haven't been to Chumley's in about 5 years. The last time I was there it was full of NYU students, and the bartender claimed to be out of cream and couldn't make me a white russian, so my friends and I went to a restaurant down the block and hung out.

But I have fond memories of the place. I once tried to fix up two of my friends at Chumley's. Ex sweetie pie and I, two of my girlfriends and their potential dates spent a lovely evening having dinner at Chumleys. Well, it was good for one of the guys, who I shall call Ted (I met him at one of my temp jobs), since he ended up at one end of the table with my two girlfriends, while the other guy, IHBF, was at the other end with ex sweetie pie having to listen to him talk about how much he loved me. Oops!

The last time I ate at Chumley's, we sat in a booth all the way in the back near the kitchen, where I had the misfortune to see Minnie the mouse nibbling on a loaf of bread which was sitting at the waiters station. I had a funny feeling that the unnibbled part was going to end up in someone's bread basket.

Chumley's had a rich history. It was a speakeasy during prohibition. The food was never that good but there was something to be said about standing in a bar that had been around for over 80 years. Since the demise of Gage and Tollner, Luchows, and a host of other New York institutions, it would be a shame if a landmark piece of New York history disappeared for good.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Female Comebacks

Female Comebacks!
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Summer of the Supernatural

Okay, so I was feeling a little bereft now that The Bachelor, Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, Dancing with the Stars, and American Idol are over for the summer. But thanks to BBC America, I now have three shows to occupy my time. Of course, one of those shows is Footballer's Wives, now in its final season with the one and only Joan Collins in the cast.

The other two are Hex and Hyde. I watched a marathon of Hex this past weekend, and I'm definitely hooked although so far there are so many loose ends it's not even funny. For those you don't have cable or BBC America, Hex takes place at a boarding school in the country. Cassie is a misfit who has only one friend, Thelma who is in love with her. Cassie however longs for Troy. Then one day she finds an old vase stuck behind a loose brick and she has sudden flashes of memory, and a newly found talent for telekinesis. Oh, and this fallen angel Azazeal keeps stalking her.

It turns out that she's descended from a long line of witches, and the Medenham Hall where she goes to school is the family estate. I won't go into too much more detail but the show is like Buffy and Charmed put together. The only problem so far is the charater of Cassie, she's so passive for the most part, apart from a few moments where she uses her powers to get back at this guy Leon, who spreads rumors about her and who tries to get it on with her (shades of Carrie).

She has absolutely no curiousity about this family that she's descended from. Not once does she ask questions, or do any research, or even explore her powers fully. She falls for the charms of Azazeal a little too easily. It's her best friend Thelma, who becomes a lesbian ghost, who looks out for her and does all the thinking. And I was a little disappointed that the gorgeous Colin Salmon is wasted as the headmaster. I kept hoping that he was somehow involved, like a Giles was for Buffy as her watcher.

But I'm still watching and I can't wait for the second season to find out who it all turns out.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Australian Men

Is it just me or are Australian men the hottest men around? Take a look at these babies and then tell me what you think.

I have a personal history with Australian men, I dated one, a personal trainer who used to be the SAS. He was smoking hot, looked a little like Christ Daughtry but with hair. Greenish-hazel eyes. I used to call him my cowboy from the outback. The first time I met him, he pulled a bottle of Jack Daniels out of his boot. I thought it was incredibly sexy.

Now do you see why I'm dying to go to Australia?

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Literary Idol?

So New York Magazine this week has an article on 60 little known novels which is great, (I admit that I've never heard of any of the books on the list and reading the brief summaries, I doubt that I will ever read them. Not when I still have the latest JD Robb to get through).

and also undiscovered talent. It seems they asked several writing teachers to nominate their best students for Literary Idol, and the readers of the magazine are allowed to vote on who would be the best new talent. You can read excerpts from their work on the site.

The kicker? They are all men except for one lone woman, and they all write literary fiction. Which is fine but I find it hard to believe that the couldn't find more than one woman to nominate.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

For Your Consideration

Dear Mr. Guest,

I've enjoyed your work over the years from The Princess Bride, Saturday Night Live, and of course, Spinal Tap. In particular, the movies that you've directed from Waiting for Guffman to a Mighty Wind have been some of my favorites. I think that you are a comic genius.

I just watched your last movie, For Your Consideration last night. And I have to say that I was very disappointed. After a rousing start, the movie kind of petered out. And we never found out what happened to the one cast member of 'Home for Thanksgiving' who was actually nominated for the Academy Award. Plus, once the movie was renamed from 'Home for Purim' all the comedy kind of died. Not even the scenes of the actors promoting the film on talk shows as weird as the TLC spoof, or seeing Catherine O'Hara tarted up like a parade float were that interesting.

So here is my suggestion for your next film. The publishing industry, or more specific romance writers. Yes, this is just ripe for your brand of satire, particularly RT's annual convention. You could call it the WWR conference aka We Write Romance or Women Write Romance as the case may be.

Just think of what you could with the grand doyenne of romance, Kathryn Falk or the late, lamented Barbara Cartland. After all Kathryn Falk was once named one of the most interesting people in Time Magazine's 75 year history. I think that your usual repetoire of actors could come up with some fascinating characters.

Just think about it. And if you do decide this will be your next picture, you don't have to pay me, just invite me to the premiere, and thank me on all the talk shows, and a tour of the House of Lords would be nice.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth K. Mahon

EHarmony - Not so Harmonious

You know those EHarmony commercials where they have the testimonys from all the loving couples who instantly fell in love because they were matched up by EHarmony's patented compatability test? Did they even mention that it costs $60 for just one month of the service? Or that if you sign up for a year, they charge you $251 right off the bat? What about the fact that 3/4 of the men I'm oh so compatabile with seem to live 8 states away?

Yes, that' s right, apparently I'm compatabile with guys who live in Missoula, Montana but not guys who live in the tri-state area. Seriously, Missoula Montana? Doesn't Ted Turner own the state? Didn't he steal back in the 19th century from the Native Americans?

When I filled out my profile on EHarmony, and I said that I would be willing to relocate for love, I meant San Francisco, Philadelphia, Chicago, Boston, Washington, DC. You know a real city with a sports team, and decent theater. Not middle of nowhere Montana. I don't care if this guy is the absolute love of my life, I'm not moving to frickin Montana. Isn't that where Brokeback Mountain was set?

Seriously, Mr. Montana can move to New York, if we're so compatable. I mean, I actually do know someone who met her husband through EHarmony, but he lives in Philly which is a short train ride away. That's doable. Montana is not.

I think I might have to go back to JDate.

Idol Thoughts

I'm having query fever right now. I've sent off four queries just this morning, plus a partial request after an agent responded to my email query. I'm not sure why I'm suddenly so much more motivated. Maybe the fact that I finished the revisions on the YA, and now I'm excited to get it out to people.

Not so excited about the American Idol finale. In fact, for the first time in six years, I didn't even watch it. Partly because I was so pissed that they voted Melinda off, and partly because I knew out of the two, Blake and Jordin, Jordin was going to win.

Still that doesn't quite explain my apathy. After all, I still watched even though Chris Daughtry (my favorite) didn't win, and I knew pretty much that Taylor was going to win.

Maybe it's just that last season's contestants were so good. Let's face, almost every single one has landed a record contract and Chris Daughtry has outsold Taylor. Even little Kellie Pickler is becoming quite the Country star, and she has new breasts.

I'm sorry apart from Jordin, Blake, Lakisha and Melinda, most of the other contestants were either boring, out of their depth, or just not interesting. Seriously Sanjaya was the best that Simon, Paula and Randy could find out of the group that auditioned in Hollywood for the semi-finals, and Hayley?

I was just emailing the other day with another Idol fan, and we basically came to the conclusion that the Idol format seems to favor women over men. Out of six winners, four are women. I think maybe it's because the favored format for the show is pop music and most men tend to fall in either the rock, country or soul categories. The only real male pop singer the show has produced is Clay Aiken.

Even the crappy songs that they give the winners to sing favor female voices. Anyone remember how painful it was to listen to Justin and Bo Bice sing the AI coronation song? I can just imagine what Beat Box Boy (Blake) thought when they handed 'This is my now' to him. Plus, I read that he wasn't even allowed to rearrange it for his voice because it was the contest winner.

Think back to last season, when Taylor basically told the producers where they could put the song they originally gave him, and then he was allowed to Taylorize the one he eventually sang. Even Ruben and Clay were given different songs to sing.

Personally, I think that's the right choice. Let whoever is in the final two pick the song they want to sing, out of a bunch that has been written. Or if you're going to have a contest, let the two finalists sing the top two songs out of the bunch, and let the audience vote for which one should be the winning song.

Anyway, I still think the show favors the women.

Favorite Book Meme - Part Deux

I thought I would mention another of my favorite authors who might not be well known. Her name is Susan Howatch and I first discovered her way back when I was in high school. She had written a series of gothic/romantic suspense books, including my absolute favorite, called The Devil on Lammas Night.

I'm thrilled that they've released all three books in one volume. The Devil on Lammas Night should absolutely be a movie starring Keira Knightly and Daniel Craig as Tristan. I won't give away the plot, just know that it's incredibly well done, and could a run for the money to any paranormal written today.

She also wrote a series of family sagas, including Penmarric, Wheel of Fortune, and Cashelmara that are based on the Plantagenet dynasty. I guess you can tell that the Plantagenets are one of my favorite periods of English history. You can blame Shakespeare's history plays, Anya Seton's Katherine, or even The Lion in Winter. Or maybe Jean Plaidy's books but I've always been fascinated by them. They seem to put the fun in dysfunctional more than any other family. I mean the Windsor's have nothing on the double-dealing, and double-crossing that went on in this family. The Wars of the Roses is just the tip of the iceberg. England's involvement in Ireland started with Henry II, leading do almost 900 years of the Irish trying to get rid of the English after inviting them in to help against the Norse invaders.

Anyway back to Susan Howatch. Penmarric which is set in Cornwall is a thinly veiled version of Henry II, Eleanor of Acquitaine and their children. But the great thing about her books, is that they are so absorbing, that you don't even have to know the history to enjoy them. Although if you do, it's even better, and she certainly gives you little tid-bits by the quotes in the front.

Cashelmara is set in Ireland, and is the whole Edward II, Roger de Mortimer, Isabella of France story. And Wheel of Fortune which is set in Wales, deals with Edward III.

Lately she's been using the history of the Church of England in the 20th Century for her novels. I'm such an Anglophile that I just ate this series up, plus I was raised High Church Episopalian so the novels had a great deal of resonance for me.

So I hope you enjoyed reading about another favorite of mine.

EKM

Cute Summer Shoes

So, the parent company of Gap/Old Navy/Banana Republic has just opened an on-line shoe store called Piperlime. I have no idea where they got the name from, but they do have some really cute summer shoes.

Like the pink number on the left. Isn't it adorable. Notice the sweet little bow, and the not too high heel. Would be perfect with a white skirt.

Then we have this red pair below. I have never owned a pair of red shoes before, but I think I may have to make an exception for this pair. What I like about them is that they are kind of the type of shoe that you would see women wearing in the 1940's. I have absolutely nothing in my closet that would go with this pair of shoes, but that has never stopped me before from buying a pair of shoes that I liked.

I'm the type of woman who builds her wardrobe around her shoes. I used to be the opposite. I wouldn't buy a pair of shoes that I liked if I had nothing currently in my closet that matched the shoes. Looking back on in it now, I think about all the great shoes I could have owned. Now if I see a hot pair of shoes like the ones on the left, I'm more inclined to buy them and then go shopping for outfits that would go with the shoe. Not necessarily vintage clothes, because that might be a little too matchy-matchy, but definitely retro vintage like Betsey Johnson would work with these shoes.

Finally, I found a nice pair of white Via Spiga sling-backs that I definitely plan on buying. They're white patent leather, and they would go great with several outfits I already own. Plus they're not too expensive. I shudder at the idea of paying $800 for a pair of shoes, although that was the plan when I turned 40. I was going to splurge and buy a pair of Manolo Blahniks or Jimmy Choos. Instead, I went to Venice.

Thanks for reading!

EKM

Little Known Favorites Meme

I found this on Megan Frampton's blog, so I'm borrowing it because I have no idea what to write about, and I need to finish working on this novella that I have going for the Brava contest.

The Little-Known Favorites Meme Rules:

List and describe three of your favorite books that other people might not be familiar with. Then tag five people. See, easy!

My three books are:

Sharon Kay Penman: Here Be Dragons/Falls the Shadow/The Reckoning

All of Sharon Kay Penman's historical novels are wonderful. This trilogy deals with King John and his daughter Joanna, his son Henry III and his sister who marries Simon de Montfort, and their daughter who marries Llewellyn the last Prince of Wales. Excellent historical fiction. I almost picked her book on Richard III, the Sunne in Splendor which is also incredibly brilliant. If you are one of a Ricardian like me, you'll love Sunne in Splendor.

Freya North: Sally

English chick-lit at it's best. Sally is a school teacher who doesn't want to fall in love, she just wants to have a sexual affair like a character in a Jackie Collins novel but she ends up falling in love with Richard, a sexy architect that she meets at a party. You have to order it from Amazon.co.uk because unfortunately unlike other English novelists like Anna Maxted (also brilliant), Lisa Jewell, and Sophie Kinsella, for some reason her books haven't been published here in the States.

Matthew von Unwerth - Freud's Requiem

This is non-fiction but it reads like fiction. The prose is absolutely beautiful and don't let the fact that it's about Freud, Rainer Maria Rilke and Lou Andreas-Salome stop you from picking it up. He's written an interesting book about what might have taken place one summer between the three of them that led Freud to write his essay On Transience. I actually had to read this twice because I was too busy looking up stuff on Wikipedia. A thought-provoking meditation on grief, mortality, and the soul, through a reading of Freud's argument about creativity with poet Rainer Maria Rilke. He explores Freud's provocative ideas on the connections between creativity and mortality in this elegant literary musing

I am tagging:

Karen Scott - who I know will have a lot of interesting things to say about books!

Kelly Para who's first book just hit the shelves. Go out and pick up a copy of Graffitti Girl!

Mary F, who now has plenty of time now that Grey's Anatomy and Supernatural have had their season finales. What did you think of Burke walking out on Cristina?

Gabrielle who probably has wonderful French and Australian writers to tell us about.

Marianne at Cosmos & Chat.

Thanks, Megan! This was fun!

EKM

I'm a Celebrity Magnet, Get Me Out of Here!

So there I am at Laguardia Airport on Friday, in the Marine Air Terminal which I think is the same one that Lindbergh left from on his transatlantic flight to Paris, when who do I see belly up to the snack bar? Billy Connolly that's who. John Brown of Mrs. Brown, Deacon Brodie, the boyfriend in White Oleander, among others.

Sigh! Why won't these celebrities leave me alone?

EKM

Where's Elizabeth Barrett Browning when you need her?

I'm in a dilemma. I'm trying to write an email, to a really cute author, who's single, who's book I've just read. I want to make it flirty and cute, and peak his interest. The only problem? I have no clue how to do this.

Yes, I'm a writer and I don't know how to write to cute guys. This is why I'm still single at ripe of old age, of, well we dont' need to talk about that. To top it all of, this writer, my friend has met him and told me how cute, funny and smart he is. So why don't you have your friend introduce you, I hear you ask? Well, my friend has two kids, a husband, and a busy life. If I waited for her, I'd either be dead or collecting social security. Let's face it, your married friends don't find your singlehood as interesting as you do. No, they're too busy talking about how cool it is that you get to travel wherever you want, without having to worry about buying a seat for your 18 month old on the plane. Meanwhile all you want is a husband and a child.

I've tried all the on-line dating services. Either the guys are too old, or they live in Nebraska. Or I get emails from European men who live in the middle of nowhere Italy. And are 23, and don't speak English very well. So I would wink at guys, and never hear anything. One night, I think I winked at 17 guys on Match.com. So emailing them is out of the questions.

Things were so much easier when Robert Browning was courting Elizabeth Barrett through their letters and poems, before they finally met. Imagine how romantic is must have been for her, an invalid to receive a letter from a younger poet about her work, and then they meet and he finally turns out to be really cute and he falls in love with her and they run off and get married and live happily until her death.

I wish I could hire someone to write the email for me. I asked a friend who is really good at this sort of thing. And I'm still waiting. I swear this could a be a romantic comedy along the lines of Truth About Cats and Dogs but with the Internet. Cute girl but not stunning helps stunning friend who is illiterate (well not really) write letters to guys on the Internet. Mandy Moore would probably play the cute girl, and maybe Jessica Simpson could play the busty ditz.

As for me? Back to the drawing board.

Thanks for reading!

EKM

Giada's Weekend Getaways

Dear Giada,

I love your shows. Everyday Italian has been one of my favorites for awhile, and now you have a new show, Giada's Weekend Getaways, where you explore a different city over a 3 day weekend. One of the reasons that I like your show is that you're the anti-Rachael Ray. Meaning that you're not an over-hyped, over caffeinated host. I've enjoyed the shows so far on Los Angeles, Chicago, and Newport.

However, I have to say that I was totally disappointed in the show that you chose to do about New York. First up, you took a cab to Brooklyn? Let's not mention that a cab to Brooklyn, if you can get one to take you there, is expensive. How about letting your viewers know that it's perfectly safe and better to take the subway?

Then when you get there you choose to visit Jacques Torres, instead of say the Brooklyn Brewery, which would have been awesome. I mean, Brooklyn Brewery is the first brewery to move back to the borough since the seventies. Not to mention visiting Junior's cheesecake. Instead you went to the River Cafe and Grimaldi's pizza. So boring and safe.

Then the next day, instead of showing off one of New York's fantastic brunch places, you went to H&H bagel. And then all you bought at Zabar's was smoked salmon pate? Out of that whole huge store? No Babka, no rugelach, nothing. I can't quibble with your having dinner at the Modern. That looked fantastic, and I thought going to the top of Reockefeller Center instead of the Empire State building was good too.

But come on, you go to Chinatown Brasserie for dim sum instead of going to Chinatown? What an insult. The wealth of good food in this city, and you chose the least interesting places to eat.

Shame on you Giada!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Happy Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day which is a bittersweet day for me since my mom is no longer living, but I wanted to celebrate all those Moms out there and to share some memories of my Mom.

One of my favorite stories is the one my mother loved to tell about how she tried to leave the hospital early after giving birth to me to vote. See I was born the day before the Presidential election, and my mother, die-hard Democrat that she was, wanted to make sure that she cast her vote. Oh, and to get a pack of cigarettes. Well, apparently the nurse wasn't too keen on that. See this was back in the olden days when new mother's typically spent a week in the hospital after giving birth, not like today where hospitals kick you out as soon as they cut the umblical chord.

Even though my mother assured her that she was coming back (!), the nurse wouldn't let my mother leave. So my mother had to stay smokeless for another week, and she didn't get to cast her vote.

My other favorite story is how she grabbed Telly Savalas on the street and planted one on him. My mother adored Telly Savalas, go figure. So when he was filming on the street where she worked, she took the opportunity to go outside and tell him what a big fan she was. And grab him by the lapels and give him a big smooch. I don't remember how my dad felt about that. Apparently Telly was so inspired, that he was grabbing women himself and giving them a little of the Savalas magic.

So Happy Mother's Day Mom! I miss you!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

I Love the '80's

So I was watching the Hugh Grant/Drew Barrymore film this afternoon 'Music and Lyrics' that kind of came and went back in February. Not a great movie, but if you love the '80's, it's pretty awesome in the way that it recreates not just the music but the music videos from back then. I mean look at the picture on the left. That could one of a million '80's pop bands, including Wham! and A-HA.

Remember Andrew Ridgely of Wham!? I didn't think so, not many people did after the band broke up. Everyone knows George Michael. Well Hugh Grant plays an Andrew Ridgely type character in the movie, Alex Fletcher.

I have to admit that I love the '80's. Sure it was a disaster for fashion, although for some reason it's coming back. Think of all the bubble skirts and leggings of the past season. Well, I wore them the first time they were in fashion, and it wasn't an attractive look then. Not to mention the shoulder pads we wore. In fact, you could buy them and attach them to your clothes. Yikes! And the big hair. All you have to do is look at a Paula Abdul video to see the hair and the reason why there is a gigantic hole in the ozone layer.

Actually I was watching the video for 'Cold-hearted snake' on You Tube. Wow, back than that video was cutting edge. Now after Christina Aquilera's dirty video, it just looks quaint. And the see through shirt and the bra. Man, people are still rocking that look almost 20 years later.

VH-1 had this series a few years back called 'Bands Reunited' where they tried to united bands like Berlin (happened) and Squeeze (didn't happen). They also united Haircut 100 and of all people, Kajagoogoo. Never heard of them? Well they had one hit song and then fired the lead singer.

Ah, the 80's. Culture Club, The Thompson Twins, Human League, Depeche Mode who I first heard in 1981 when I spent the summer in London. Duran Duran, the hair bands, power ballads. The cheesy videos that looked like they were made for a buck fifty before Michael Jackson decided to make mini-movies instead of music videos.

I sound like my parents when I say they just don't make them like they used to anymore!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Bowling for Dollars

Last night for the first time in almost 9 years, I went bowling with my group from work. One of our group is leaving to take a new position in the firm, so we all decided instead of hanging out in a bar, we would do something fun together, hence bowling.

Can I just say how much fun I had? Bowling is way cool in a really dorky kind of way. And I suck at it. I mean really suck at it. The good thing is that I wasn't alone in my suckitude. Pretty much everyone else sucked as well apart from a few people who managed to break 100. But nobody sucked as much as me. In the grand scheme of suckage, I was the grand poobah of suckitude.

Seriously, at one point I dropped the ball behind me when I was getting ready to bowl. That's how bad I am. But it doesn't' matter because I had fun. This is a big thing for me because I am a perfectionist. If I can't do something well, I don't want to do it all. So the fact that I can go bowling and suck and be cool about it, is a huge step for me.

Now I can't wait to go bowling again!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

May Moping

So far, May is sucking big time. Not only did I receive another rejection letter, this time one of those form email rejection letters from an agency that has had my partial for about 5 months, but I just found out that my night job is cutting the Associate Editor positions, which means although I'm still employed, I'm back now making what I made before which is much less. I'm going to have to do that economizing thing which I hate, but I've been living a little too high on the hog, eating a great deal of sushi which costs a bomb here in NYC.

May has always been a really hard month for me, which is kind of ironic because it's also my favorite month of the year. The lilacs are out (my favorite flower) and spring usually arrives in New York around this time. But May is also my father's birthday (he would have been 92 this year), and Mother's Day (it's been almost 19 years since my mother passed away). Not to mention May is the month when ex-sweetie pie and I broke up and also the month that I learned who my true friends were. So I'm not really feeling the warm fuzzies right now.

I'm trying to think positively. I'm flying out to Chicago next weekend, to get away from the fact that my ex-best friend is getting married. I'm also working hard on two novellas for the Brava novella contest (I have two ideas and I can't decide between them so I thought why not write both, the contest doesn't start until August). I still have two agents who want my full YA manuscript. And I still have the rest of Beau Brummel with the delectable James Purefoy still to finish watching.

Doesn' t he look yummy in his bath?

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Changes Afoot

So last night I got home from my dance classes (salsa/mambo and hustle) to find a letter from RWA with a proxy form since I'm not going to be going to Dallas this year (Been there, done that, have the T-shirt). Apparently the board has voted to get rid of the novel with strong romantic elements category in the Golden Heart but not the RITA. Why? Since the contest is for unpublished authors, RWA feels that they should be promoting romance.

Okay, on the one hand, I can see there point, but on the other hand, there are at least 5 other categories for people to enter if they are writing a romance. So why drop this one category? Is it that they're afraid that more people will enter this category than the others? I don't think so. I would say that, given the number of people who are members of the Chick-lit chapter, compared to say the total number of RWA members, it's pretty small. The chick-lit chapter last time I looked had about 300 members, give or take, and not all of them are entering the Golden Heart.

In fact, quite a few people that I know who have entered the Golden Heart, some have entered in more than one category, with more than one manuscript in that same category. If you're going to change anything, how about limiting the number of entries an author can submit in any given category. That would make sense. The same goes for the RITA. Why have Nora Roberts compete against herself, or her pseudonymn, JD Robb?

They also want to get rid of the Novella category as well. Given the number of anthologies that are published every year by all publishing houses, this also to me seems like a waste of time. Seriously, is it just me or does seem like the board of RWA spends alot of time thinking about nothing in particular?

The one board meeting that I attended, most of the meeting was taken up with that ole definition of romance. It was clear then, that there was a faction on the board who were not happy with the whole chick-lit/erotica/erotic romance boom of the past ten years. Just the fact that you cannot join PAN unless you've written a romance or your book is published by an RWA approved publisher proves that.

Oy, color me annoyed.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Manic Monday

I'm pleased to report that I finished the revisions on my YA novel, and I just have to do one final read-through before I email it off to the two agents who requested the full manuscript. I also read the first 15 pages of the novella that I'm working on for the Brava contest and is so does not suck as much as I thought it did. Although I realize from reading a couple of novellas, that I need to open it with more of a bang so to speak. So back to the drawing board. I'm hoping to have it finished by the end of the month so that I can finish the other YA that I started.

I've been quite the busy social bee as well attending benefits and an auction preview. The benefit was awesome, although I'm come to the conclusion that I know I'm a writer because when crappy stuff happens I think, I'm so using this in a book. The auction preview was better, although drinking 4 glasses of champagne before my night job and then having to watch NUMBERs was not a good idea.

We had our chapter brunch on Saturday, with Lauren Willig, the author of History of the Pink Carnation as our guest speaker. She was so adorable I couldn't hate her for being 30. Once again, sucked down the champagne (what can I say I'm a sucker for it, just like the cutie holding the glass from Woody Allen's Match Point. His name is Matthew Goode, and he's scruptilicious).

Have to finish working on expense reports for my day job since I'm finished my revisions, and then it's back to the quill and paper.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Words Only Women Use

1.) FINE : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2.) Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five Minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5) Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statementoften misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7.) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome.

8.) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying SCREW YOU!

9.) Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking, "what's wrong", for the woman's response refer to # 3.

Congratulations!

From Publishers Lunch:

Debut
Lisa VanAuken writing as Lisa Dale's THE LUCKY MOON, exploring the mysterious connectivity between mothers and daughters, cities and mountains, the present and the past, to Melanie Murray at Grand Central, in a nice deal, in a two-book deal, by Kim Lionetti at BookEnds (world).


Lisa used to be a member of my local chapter RWA NYC, and she was also the first agent that I sent my book to when she worked at Creative Media which is now Folio. She wrote me a really good rejection letter which I took to heart, and made me work harder on my next few books. She was also a friend's agent. I'm so excited for her.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

May Man Madness

I am incredibly hungover today after consuming 4 glasses of wine, and very little dinner last night at a benefit, however, I've decided that May will be the month of Man madness and particularly British men.

Today's specifiman is Jason Isaacs. Why? Well, I was watching this awesome miniseries this weekend called 'The State Within' on DVD and he played the British Ambassador to the US. If you get a chance, rent it from Netflix, it's really good.

He also plays Draco Malfoy's dad in the Harry Potter movies. I'm not sure when I was first aware of his work. He just seems to have appeared one day in a lot of movies that were filmed for American television in England, usually playing priests which is interesting since he's Jewish!

The picture on the left is from the film, The Patriot, which I actually hated but he was wonderful as Mel Gibson's foil, based on a real person. Now he stars in the Showtime series, The Brothers which I have to rent from Netflix.

I think what I like about him, besides his beautiful blue eyes, and his handsome face, is the intelligence of his performances. Even when he's playing a bad guy, you can sense that there is something more going on with him.

So check him out!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Hot British Guys Volume 1

Well, I'm 99% done with the revisions on my YA. I still have one more chapter to rewrite, and then another read through before I sent it off to the two agents who want the full manuscript. And then I need to take a break from YA and work on the novella I want to submit to the Brava contest.

I've been reading other novellas just to get a sense of the format. I think no matter what happens, I'll have learned something from the experience. Convincing readers that two people are meant for each other in the space of 90 pages is a challenge that I'm actually looking forward to.

The chap on the left is Timothy Dalton, one of my first crushes. I first came upon Mr. Dalton while watching The Lion in Winter with Katherine Hepburn and Peter O'Toole. If you haven't seen this film, rent it. It's brilliant, far superior to the remake with Glenn Close and Patrick Stewart. Timothy plays the young King of France. From my first sight of him, I was hooked, and I've been a fan ever since. I've some incredible crap just to see him, like the last film Mae West ever did which was one too many, Sextette. Oy! Don't ask.

Centennial, a miniseries where he played Joan Collins brother, and Scarlett where he was the only actor who could play Rhett Butler, if they couldn't dig Clark Gable up and reanimate him. He's my favorite Bond after Daniel Craig (sorry Sean). His were the first Bond films that I sat all the way through and could understand the plots. I was so jealous when I learned that Vanessa Redgrave was his girlfriend for a number of years. Sigh! Lucky bitch. He actually made me forget about Laurence Olivier as Heathcliff, and I adored his Mr. Rochester in Jane Eyre.

And now he's in the new film Hot Fuzz! I had planned on seeing it anyway because it sounded like fun, but now I can go and bask in the still handsome features of Timothy Dalton. Dude looks fab for 61.

Thanks for reading!

EKM

Real Estate Porn - the Friday Edition

I'm back! Well briefly. I still have two chapters to write and edit before I'm finished with the revisions on my YA. It seems like it's taken forever, but I'm really pleased with the way the book is turning out. The ending may need to be tightened up a little, but I'm clocking in at 75,000 words and 265 pages, which is ten pages less than my last YA. So I'm slowly learning to write tighter and tighter.

When I'm done, I'm sending the book off to my trusty readers and the manuscript critique service that I use to peruse the book before I send it off to the 2 agents that have requested the full. Yes, I did say two! I had another agent request this week, which sort off set the rejection that I got from another agent who was very complimentary and wants to work with my, but is not really interested in doing YA at this moment. She's looking more for women's fiction and romance, which I have. So I may just brush off one of my women's fiction hybrids at some point and shoot it off to her while I'm still doing the YA thang.

The goal of course is to have an agent who can do both. In the meantime, a writer that I know has said that I can use her name to query an editor at Hyperion books, so I'm definitely going to do that next week. Also, I want to go back and finish writing the novella that I hope to enter Kensington Brava's Novella line.

But back to the title of this post. I went to an opening of a brand new condominium development in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. For anyone who doesn't really know New York very well, Williamsburg is like the first stop on the L train. It's been an up and coming neighborhood for the past ten years, but now developers are really swooping and building new developments. Probably because they've been priced out of developing in Manhattan. The neighborhood used to be very blue collar Polish and Russian immigrants. Then came the artists and actors looking for cheap rents. And now the yuppies.

I have to give the developers credit so far, all the new buildings that I saw where relatively consistent with the rest of the neighborhood. No really tall buildings. I think the tallest one I saw had ten stories.

This development is called Ikon, and you would have thought that rock stars and movie stars were driving in, because they actually had a red carpet! We all had to sign a waiver before we could go up that we wouldn't sue the developers if we say, fell through a hole in the floor or the elevator crashed. Up on the top floor was where the party was, with a free open bar and a specialty drink, the Pomtini, which is still the rage here in New York.

Downstairs was the model apartment, a two bedroom, all the mod cons, priced at least $800,000. I thought it was very small, and I'm not fond of the open living/kitchen/dining room thing. Basically it was three rooms since the kitchen couldn't really count as a room. The bathrooms were nice, all brick exposed walls etc. You could also, for an added fee of course, get this video service whereby you could control the climate, the lights, the DVD player, order food etc. all from this video screen on the wall in the kitchen.

It was interesting, but I'm not sure it's for me. However, I did enjoy the free drinks and snacks before I went home to watch Ugly Betty and Grey's Anatomy.

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down

It's not just raining cats and dogs here, but elephants, kangaroos, polar bears. I mean it's seriously pouring outside and has been all day. Yesterday was beautiful, the sun was out, we had tons of people at our April meeting, and not just because we had the lovely Leslie Wainger as our speaker. Several guests, and some members who hadn't been seen in awhile showed up. Primarily because it turned out that we were expecting a N'oreaster, which made me think of George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg in The Perfect Storm, and the Groton's fisherman who has forever been ruined by that awful Jennifer Love Hewitt film, I know What You Did Last Summer.

Afterward, a group of us went to a little tea place where we chatted for a little bit before I ran home to take a nap before my night job. Oh, and I also had a hissy fit in my accountants office when I realized that I was getting absolutely no money from the Federal Government and that I owed a huge amount to New York State because my old temp agency neglected to take out any city tax, and my night job apparently didn't take out enough state tax either. I'm so ticked off. Apparently, even though I made money as a writer, I had to say that I took a loss because my writing income was not on a 1099 but a W-2 form, even though my job title is freelance writer.
Also, I made too much money last year.

Then today while it was like Noah's Ark outside, I tried to watch the Christian Bale/Hugh Jackman film The Prestige, but it gave me a headache because it kept jumping back and forth in time etc. So I gave up about halfway through the film, which bothered me because usually I'll watch a film all the way through unless it's really awful, so I hated giving up on The Prestige.

On a lighter note, I set up a My Space page at www.myspace.com/elizabethkerrimahon so come on by and say hello!

Thanks for reading,

EKM

Bad, Bad, Blogger

I know I am a shameful blogger, but I have an excuse. I'm still busy editing the YA that the agent requested, so that I can email it to her assistant by next week, and it needs alot of work. Right now, I'm still working on the first 10 chapters, getting them so clean that you could eat off of them, or at least not spot the plot holes so much. I have a good feeling that I'm making the book stronger, and raising the stakes, but its going so sloooooooooooooooooooooow.





Plus, I opened the mailbox on Saturday to find one of those so-called 'good' rejection letters from an agent that chatted on one of the YA loops that I belong to. This one said that I had 'colorful characters' and that he enjoyed reading it and thought teens would really be interested in my take on the plot but didn't feel he was the right agent to represent it. All of which mystifies me. You liked the book, you think that teens will buy it, but you don't want to represent it. Okay.



I felt the way that Karina Smirnoff felt last night trying to teach Billy Ray Cyrus, the Paso Doble. She ended up crying in the bathroom, because he just wasn't getting it. That's kind of how I felt, my friends get the book, teens will like the book, but if I could only convince, a frickin agent of that.

Sigh! Well, I have more editing to do.

EKM

TGIF

Thank god it's Friday, is all I have to say. Even though I'm here at work (until 11:30 because my boss is a dunderhead), at least I get to go home soon, and I have Saturday and Sunday off. Whoo-hoo.

Been doing lots of thinking about the YA that I need to revise. I need to do more with the columns that my two characters are writing for the newspaper, perhaps have them debate or something on local TV. Something to move the plot along. And more high school stuff. Like bowling! I also need to crunch the first three chapters into two but still get in all the information that I need to.

Was on Amazon.com yesterday and there are some groovy new YA books coming out soon, including the third book by Libba Bray, a fourth Jessica Darling book by Megan Mccafferty, a new E. Lockhart, the second Secret Society Girl book (which I may try and scarf at BEA), and two more Meg Cabot books, one of which is a Manga! Not to mention that I discovered a new YA author on line, who's books I need to try out.

Went to the theater last night, and saw an interesting new play by Bernard Weintraub, who used to write for the NYT called Accomplices about how the US basically did nothing while Jews were being slaughtered by the Nazi's. It had a documentary feel to it and it raised some interesting questions. There's a forum going on at Fordham in June dealing with the subject that I might go to. I also ran into a guy I went to college with, so that I was interesting, and I went with a new friend, so it was all good.

I'm totally into this show on the Sundance Channel called 'Ladette to Lady' which is where 10 girls who are totally girls gone wild, or tomboys with no social skills are sent to finishing school to learn to become ladies. This is not some exploitation show like the one on VH-1 where Monique tries to turn the heifers from Flava of Love into ladies. These girls seriously want to learn to better themselves, and since England still has a bit of a class system, it's really interesting to watch them struggle to try and change. For them, it's a chance at a better job, although it's going to be hard when they go back home to keep from slipping back into their old ways.

Hope everyone has a good weekend with great weather!

EKM

Revisions Traumarama

Yikes, I just got an email from Important Agent's assistant asking for the full manuscript for my second YA, which is great, but I just re-read the thing, and I have a lot of work to do to whip it into shape before I can email it to her. The ending needs some work, I need to trim some other scenes, and totally rewrite others. All in about two weeks, because I don't want to let it go much longer than before I send it to her.

This is what happens when you finish the book, and start querying. I had gotten so many rejections on the partial, that I just stopped working on the revisions for awhile since no one seemed to want to read the full manuscript. Very poor choice on my part.

The good thing is that I totally know what needs to be done to hang the story together in such away as to have it make sense and move the story along. I love when that happens. Still it's going to mean that I can no longer take of weekends from writing.

But that's a good thing because I need to start working on my writing 7 days a week. It's too hard to take the weekend off, and then start again on Monday. It takes so long to get into the swing again. It's like when you don't exercise for a few days, and then you do a spurt of a few days in a row. Your body finally gets used to the feeling, and then you stop again. Writing is a muscle that needs to be exercised all the time. Even if it's just editing what I wrote during the weekend.

Thanks for reading!

EKM

NEC and Easter

Have you ever gazed at an Easter card with a cute little bunny on it? And do you ever wonder what bunnies, and eggs for that matter, have to do with Jesus rising from the dead after the crucifixion? It turns out that in the ancient world Eostre/Ostara, was a fertility goddess whose reign over the earth began in spring. Ostara came in the form of a beautiful maiden with a basket of coloured eggs and her magical companion, a rabbit. Eventually the celebration for the spring goddess was co-opted by the Christian one - hence Easter with its component parts of eggs, bunnies, and all things spring like. Enjoy! This is just one of the many ways that pagan rituals have been incorporated into Christianity.

So, I'm back from NEC. I totally recommend if you have never been to a writer's conference, that you attend one of the many regional conferences instead of heading straight to National. Not only will you make friends, that you can hang with at National, but it's entirely less stressful. I wish that I had had my first pitch at a regional conference instead of plunging in at National. It was great seeing my NEC friends and hanging out with my number one dream agent.

Of course, I did attend some workshops, in particular a great talk with Lisa Gardner. It was really interesting hearing this sweet young woman talking about all the dark stuff that she writes about. I only bought one book, Donna Kauffman's Great Scot since I'm in charge of our chapter basket for our monthly raffle, and I'm doing a Scottish theme this month. The costume party was so much fun, it was great to see how many people got into the spirt of dressing up. My costume was so successful, I now know what I'm going as for Halloween this year!

Also the food was so much better at this conference than at National. Plus we had three meals plus the chocolate party. FYI to National, you're not really helping us save money on the conference fee by cutting out the lunches, since we have to go find food elsewhere. When you've schlepped half way across the country, having to run out to find a meal sucks.

The only quibble I had was with the hotel shuttle service. Apparently it's first come, first served, which makes no sense. I had a very tight schedule, which I indicated to the desk clerk. I was taking the Acela back to New York which left at 11:15, which meant that I had to take the 10:05 commuter train back to Boston. So she told me to come back at 9:30 to arrange for the shuttle van which I did only to be told that the shuttle was gone and wouldn't be back in time for me to get to the train.

Well, I let them know that wasn't acceptable, so the other desk clerk drove me to the station. First come, first served is absolutely ridiculous. It takes no time at all to keep a list of people who need to take the shuttle at a certain time.

Other than, it was a great weekend. I'm just sad that I'm so tired after working last night on Amazing Race.

Thanks for reading,

EKM