RWA Conference Part Deux

So, I promised I'd blog about the rest of my conference experience. Thursday dawned bright and early and I actually managed to get up and work out in the gym before heading downstairs for breakfast. Since we were having lunch that day, and given my experiences with the so-called vegetarian meals that hotels typically serve, I thought it best to eat a huge breakfast. So I ate at the restaurant in the hotel, a lovely mushroom omelette, and hash browns that were way too salty. Plus lots of coffee and a glass of orange juice that cost the same as an issue of Glamour.

Then I headed off to Debra Dixon's GMC workshop which was full, so instead I went to Eileen Rendahl's workshop, the chick-lit hero's journey, which I thought was about guy's but actually turned out to be how to use Christopher Vogler's book, the Hero's Journey when you write. Afterwards, I headed over to Emily Giffin's workshop, which was very interesting about how she at first wrote Something Borrowed about Darcy and then realized that the heroine needed to be Rachel, a character that no one would ever suspect of stealing someone's fiance.

Then came lunch and Meg Cabot's hilarious speech. I'm not ashamed to say that I heart Meg Cabot. Plus she was wearing a wrap dress and really cool shoes, which you can see if you head over to her diary.

A group of us then headed out into the Hotlanta weather to visit the Margaret Mitchell house. If you're ever in Atlanta, don't miss it. You don't even have to like Gone with the Wind to be inspired (and frankly I much prefer the movie to the book. Scarlett is less of bitch). We then headed over to the gift shop where I picked up a book called Scarlett Rules and a bottle of Margaret Mitchell water ("I'll never go thirsty again").

Dinner was at Aunt Pitty-Pat's parlor (Head over to Diana Peterfreund's blog to see the photos). I was stuffed from breakfast, so I only had an appetizer of crab and artichoke dip which was totally delicious. And way too many drinks.

My evening ended at a strip club in the suburbs of Atlanta. This was my first time at a strip club, and can I tell you, I've never laughed so hard in my life. Since it was a Thursday, the place was deserted apart from our table of nine and another bachelorette party. The guys were clearly not their A team. The first guy was a good dancer but he came out wearing a turtle neck and pants, and then when he stripped down he was wearing good old Hanes instead of a thong, and his shoes and socks. So not sexy.

The next stripper was pretty good, but then this young kid wearing a baseball cap came out. He looked like Skateboard dude, not a musclebound stripper. It turned out that this was only his second night on the job and it showed. He even put his thong on wrong, and fell out when he was dancing. One our party very kindly tucked him back in for which he gave her a "Thank you, ma'am." Dude, if you want to make a living as a stripper, don't call women 'ma'am'.

Part of their shtick is to come over and talk to the women, convince us with their charm to order lap dances. Unfortunately 'Ty' (not his real name) spoiled that by basically telling us his whole life story in response to the question, "How did you start working here?" The kicker was when he said that his life was like a Lifetime TV movie, but with a guy. I was tempted to order a lap dance just to shut him up.

And then there was old dude. When I mean old, I mean in stripper years, because 4o is not old. Old dude could barely muster up any enthusiasm when he was dancing. I think at one point, he just did a handstand up against the wall and flexed his but cheeks.

Skateboarder dude also came over to talk to us. Apparently he wants to be an actor. When I mentioned that I had once been an actress, he asked for some career advice. I told him to quit stripping and audition for a prestigious summer theatre festival instead. Somehow I think it went over his head.

We finally left the club around midnight and headed back to the hotel, poorer yet wiser after our adventure in strip club land. While I had a good time, I think it's safe to say that I won't be blowing my money at a strip club anytime soon.

Thanks for reading!

EKM