And The Winner Is!

Yes! I am so happy that I can't stop smiling. I came home last night after a fabulous dinner at Chow Bar with my Impossibly Handsome British Friend certain that Archie was going to take home the crown and boy was I wrong!

David Cook won and not by a little, nope the dude beat Archie by 12 million votes. So there Simon, Paula and Randy. I wonder if this was their diabolical plan? Praise Archie to the skies and then let the voters take over.

All in all, the finale didn't totally suck although my DVR cut off Idol just after Ryan Seacrest said David Cook so I spent all last night wondering if I had heard wrong. I had to immediatel confirm it when I got up this morning and turned on the Internet. I thought the performances for the most part were pretty good except for Seal and Syesha. The song was too low for her and Seal sounded like he had a bad cold. They totally didn't blend well at all.

DC outsang Archie on 'Heroes', DC sounding remarkably like Chad Kroeger, and then we had that horrible sketch with Mike Myers pimping his new movie The Love Guru which in my humble opinion (at least judging by what I saw on the show) is totally going to tank. Amanda Overmyer looked pained to be there, like she'd just looked over her contract and realized that she was owned by 19 Entertainment for the next three months even though she didn't make the tour. Jason Castro proved that he really can't sing anything that doesn't have folk/rock vibe, although he sounded awesome on Hallelujah again.

The highlight for me besides DC playing with ZZTop was Carly Smithson and Michael Johns (looking hot as always) singing a duet on 'Letter.' I may have to go see the Idol tour if they can promise me that those two will sing a duet again. They were awesome together and should definitely record a song for their albums.

Loved Carrie Underwood's new single. Girlfriend has come along way since Idol. She's definitely become a star with a capital S. Loved the outfit, loved her stomping on the stage, and loved the song. I will definitely have to download it when I get my new iPod. Jordin Sparks, not so much. First of all, what the hell did the costume designers put her in? Or was that her stylist who should fired immediatley for gross crimes against an American Idol. She looked like a mylar balloon.

George Michael? Awesome but the dude seriously needs to take the sunglasses off indoors, particularly when you are singing. The audience would like to see your eyes (this goes for you too Archie). He sounded pretty good for someone who had a cold. How great was it to see Simon actually apologize?

And then the moment we were all waiting for:

David Cook wins.

No worries Archie, you will have a career as soon as you finish high school and you hit puberty. Hook up with David Foster, the man who gave us Josh Groban and you will be fine.

As for David Cook, I will buy his album (or download it since this is the 21th century!).

Do You Want Some Ham To Go With That Cheese?

So I settled in last night to watch the American Idol showdown and for a moment I thought I had stumbled on the WWF. What the hell was that on my show last night? That whole ridiculous boxing metaphor? Seriously? I have to give Cookie and Archie props for going along with it, and it was nice not to see Seacrest's face for the first five minutes of the show, but it was just stupid. However, I did love the fact that Archie apparently weighs the same as a golden retriever. Did anyone else vomit in their mouth a little during that whole introductory package? Both guys came out in boxing robes and gloves with cute nick-names like David 'Sugarfoot' Cook and David 'Babycakes' Archuleta. I think they even bumped gloves. The boxing metaphor went on and on, there were video segments with sportscaster Jim Lampley giving tips.

Did anyone get the feeling, besides me, that Andrew Lloyd Webber doesn't have much love for the Arch? Or that the judges did everything they could to hand the crown to David Archuleta after the first song, especially Simon. Wasn't this the man who a week ago was saying that he wanted David Cook to win? Because you wouldn't have known it by his performance last night. I read that the producers want Cook to win but I guess they didn't give the judges that memo. And geez, Randy, get some new material. During his critique of Archuleta, I swear it sounded like he was just reading off a list of things he'd previously said about Archie, everything from 'you're in the zone,' and 'you could sing the phone book.'

Clive, Clive, Clive. This is like the fourth time that Clive Davis has chose 'Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me' for a contestant in this show. Did Elton John and Bernie Taupin gift him a percentage of the royalties? Don't get me wrong, I love this song, particularly the duet that George Michael did with Elton, but the song is tired. Of course, Archie did a good job, but it was boring and were the other two songs that he sang. Three ballads in a row people. I was nodding off towards the end.

Love him or hate him but David Cook at least keeps things interesting. I actually kind of liked the song he chose from the songwriting competition. It had a good beat and you could dance to it which kind of obscured the fact that the lyrics sucked. I could actually hear that song on the radio as compared to the slice of treacle pudding that David Archuleta sang. Seriously Simon thought that was the better song?

When it comes down to it, no matter who wins, I'm buying David Cook's album and I bet I'm not the only one. See, the thing is, while tweens may love David Archuleta, they grow up and move on to other artists, and then where will David Archuleta be? Playing in Branson at the Osmond family theater that's where. Plus, the producers are going to have deal with his scary father, who makes Dina Lohan look well adjusted. Archie is no Josh Groban, who at least has a good sense of humor and is kinda hot.

Oh, and the silly boxing metaphor was over on Dancing with the Stars as well. After booting Christian in five minutes, we then had to sit through mucho filler before the final dances and Kristi being crowned the winner.

Thank God!

American Idol Bites

Well producers, you finally got your wish, Syesha Mercado is no more. Seriously, they did everything they could but pack her bags and leave them on the side of the stage on Tuesday night. Case in point, while young David got to learn his judge's song pick from the mayor of his hometown, and David Cook got to learn his while on live TV, Syesha found hers out while driving in a limo.

Then Randy gives her Alicia Keys 'If I Ain't Got You' to sing. This is the same man who keeps telling contestants not sing Whitney, Mariah, and Celine because they'll be compared to the originals. And finally the producers gave her some Rihanna reject to sing for her final song selection. And they lit her so that you could barely see her on stage. Girlfriend tried her best, but a combination of a personality that just didn't click with viewers and the judges who pretty much told her to start auditioning for the National Tour of Chicago and Rent sealed the deal.

And is it just me or could David Archuleta poop on stage and Randy Jackson would praise him for it. 'You did your thing dawg, you worked it out, it was the bomb.' Or my personal favorite, 'You're in the zone.' I get the fact that little A is a tween dream but does anyone really think that he's an American Idol. He seems so young, like he's been in a cloister for the past 17 years. I know that Jordin Sparks was young too, but Little A makes her seem ancient.

My money is on David Cook to win it. Not that I think he really needs to be forced to sing whatever 'This is my cliche' song that they come up with next week. I just hope that if he does win, the record producers let him do his thing. He's already released an independant album. Here's hoping that they listen to that, and also listen to what he has to say, the way that they did for Chris Daughtry. The reason that Chris Daughtry's album was so successful was because they let him be the artist that he really is. They didn't try to homogenize him, the way they did Bo Bice and Taylor Hicks. And he wasn't forced to making something palatable out of a song like "This Is My Now,' or 'Do I Make You Proud' (imagine what the song Taylor rejected was like).

So I'll be watching next week, because at least it won't be boring. I missed last year's finale because I pretty much knew Jordin was going to win it after Melinda Doolittle was eliminated. In a girl/guy finale, the girl usually wins, because the crappy song is usually better for her style of singing, then the guys. Except for when Taylor and Katherine McPhee went head to head because they had two different songs.

Will it be Little A or Cougar bait David Cook as the new American Idol? Does anyone really care?

The Gaffe Heard Round the World

Is Paula Abdul crazier than a bedbug? Don't answer that question, because the answer is yes. Last night, during AI, she criticized Jason Castro before he had sung his second song. She claimed that she was just reading her notes for another performer, but she clearly thought that Jason had sung two songs because she said so. Despite the fact that Ryan only asked for the judges thoughts on the FIRST song.

She claimed on Ryan Seacrest's radio talk show that she got confused because they were only supposed to give feedback at the end of show, not in the middle, so her notes about another performer got screwed up with her Jason Castro notes. Yeah right Paula. And that's just Coke in your cup (alledgedly!).

I really felt for poor Jason Castro when she told him that she didn't think he was doing enough to get into the final four right before he had to sing his second song. Clearly she wasn't talking about David Archuleta or David Cook, or the two other girls in the competition. She had to have meant Jason Castro. My feeling is that she was reading off her notes from watching the rehearsal earlier in the day on his card. Because she was actually right in that Jason Castro looks like he's sleepwalking through the rest of the competition. Like he can't believe he's gotten this far on what seems to have been a lark, and now he might actually be with in spitting distance of winning it. Holy Bong Water Batman!

Is it just me or is it pretty obvious that the judges and the producers are hoping for an all David finale? The emo rocker vs. the cute kid. Maybe I've reached reality TV saturation but I'm not really invested this year the way I have been in the past. I think that David Cook will make a great album which I would buy and listen to but little David? Not so much. I haven' t bought Jordin Sparks CD either.

Sigh!

Terrible Thursday

What is wrong with the world? I come home from having drinks with my friends to celebrate Shakespeare's birthday (yes, we are weird like that), to find out that Carly Smithson has been booted off American Idol after one of her better performances. Not only that, but Syesha Mercardo, who also rocked the house was in the bottom two. And not, Brooke 'let me start my song again' White or Jason 'I didn't know a cat sang Memory' Castro.



Seriously Jason, you didn't know a cat sang it. Did the fact that the musical is called 'CATS' confuse you? Maybe you should put that bong down and focus a little (not that I know for sure that he partakes of the wacky-tabacky). And Brooke, this is the second time that you've restarted a song during competition. Not good. I have never in 7 seasons of American Idol seen any contestant do that, and repeatedly get away with it!



I fastforwarded through Top Model and Top Chef, watching both in like an hour. Its amazing how much more interesting TM is when you fast forward through Tyra yacking, and cut to the chase during the judge's panel. And Top Chef? I'm getting a little tired of the cheftestants looking down on the challenges. Antonia and Lisa choosing not to use polish sausage when the card they pulled clearly asked for it was ridiculous. They don't like Polish sausage? Tough! Dale and Richard managed to make something tasty out of tofu so what was their problem? Although I wouldn't serve that dish to a vegetarian.



Bad week people. First Starbucks starts labeling the calorie content of their food and now this. Seriously, now that I know the calorie content, I can't order anything anymore, apart from my usual chai latte. Its taken all the fun out of eating the sweets. I didn't need to know that Cinnamon low-fat coffee cake actually has 310 calories, which isn't really that much less than the full-fat stuff.



Oh, and is anyone surprised that Star Jones is getting a divorce? She can join Terry McMillan in the 'I married a gay guy' club (not that I really know that Al Reynolds is gay, but seriously?).



Thanks for reading,



EKM

Things I don't Understand

How American Idol could be such a snoozefest last night? When Jason Castro, who looks like most of the guys I see busking on the subway in New York, can give one of the better performances with a ukelele, you know there is something wrong with the world. I came home last night after my two salsa classes (this time I wasn't sick from all the spiral turns we did) itching to watch AI on my DVR. And then I turned it on. Seriously the two performers I hate most, Kristi Lee 'I sold my horse to audition for Idol' Cook and Jason Castro sang the best. What the hell happened? I blame the whole inspirational song theme frankly.

And then I turn on GH to find Michael Corinthos Jr. has been shot in the head one month after he accidentally shot his father's girlfriend in the heart and left her for dead. I'm getting a little sick of General Sopranos that Bob Guza has been writing for the past 12 years. From Claudia Zacchara lusting after her half-brother, to an evil psychopath being transformed into the brother of one of the core characters, this show sucks. On a daily basis. Guza claims that he wants to show the fall-out from a life in the mob. How about this, why don't you have Sonny and Jason go to jail for once? Each of them have been shot like 50 times and lived, their wives and girlfriends have been shot and threatened, kidnapped because of the mob. I think we all get it, being the mob sucks.

What happened to Love in the Afternoon? There's no love on GH, just people sneaking around and lying to each other, hiding pregnancies, refusing to have brain tumors removed so that they can see their dead fiancees, casual sex and creepy evil doctors who seem to have a different speciality every day. And they wonder why people read romance!

I don't expect my soaps to reflect reality but I do expect them to at least make some sense and have continuity from one day to the next.

And is wrong that I think less of Andy Baldwin from The Bachelor that he's dating Marla Maples?

When did being a rock star mean that washing your hair was now optional?

How does one actually become an 'accidental' mistress? Does it involve tripping and falling on it? Or not knowing that the guy was married before you slept with him? Or had a girlfriend or was engaged?

Thank god I'm seeing the new Stones film tonight!

EKM